Remembering my father

My father loved to eat, and he loved to travel. He could not afford to travel before he grew old. After I started working, I brought him to visit many major cities in China. In 2007, my father had a major operation to remove a cancer tumor from his stomach. I promised to bring him to a cruise through the Yangtze river after he recovered. He fully recovered after a few months, but he could not walk long distances. I had to bring the wheelchair to the Yangtze river cruise. It was a big challenge for me because I was traveling alone with him.

I have written a blog about our trip : http://myyangtzerivercruise.blogspot.com/

I have been bringing him to the Superstar Virgo cruise once every year since 2000. His last trip with the whole family was in March this year : http://mysuperstarvirgocruise.blogspot.com/

His final journey with me was on 24 July 2009. I carried his ashes from the Mandai Crematorium to his final resting place, Nirvana Memorial at Choa Chu Kang. As I traveled on the van, holding the urn containing his ashes on my lap, the driver reminded me to call out to my father whenever we had to cross a bridge. This was the most heartbreaking journey in my life.




Tags:

A beautiful touching story.

A beautiful touching story. Thank you for sharing Tamarind.

duriz | Wed, 14/07/2010 - 1:46pm

My Condolences to you,

My Condolences to you, Tamarind.  It reminds me that we really need to treasure the time we spend with our parents.

nmhmum | Thu, 20/08/2009 - 1:15pm

That's indeed touching! I

That's indeed touching! I am sorry for your lost.

amylqf | Tue, 18/08/2009 - 1:29pm

Hi Tamarind, Thanks for

Hi Tamarind,

Thanks for sharing selflessly.

Your actions really put me to shame...I ask myself if i would be able to do to what you have done. This is indeed a timely reminder to reflect on relationships and not just the mad rush of everyday work...

Take care and be strong.

Poohbear | Mon, 17/08/2009 - 9:14am

Hi Tamarind, I'm so touched

Hi Tamarind,

I'm so touched by your blog post. You are a very filial daughter. I admire your courage, strength and great love to your father.

I'm sure your father would feel proud of you...

 

Our Little Smarties 

http://ourlittlesmarties.com/

Our Little Smarties | Sun, 16/08/2009 - 3:27pm

Dear all, Thank you for

Dear all,
Thank you for your kind and comforting words. I feel better reading what all of you have written.

Thank you so much.

tamarind | Sat, 15/08/2009 - 11:15am

You are a rare gem

A heart felt condolence to you Tamarind.

In the midst of this urban jungle, with majority of the society rushing from one end to another, comes up this rare gem, that is you.

Take care Tamarind and hang in there. Big hugs to you and I do wish the pain you are feeling will go away. Cherish and savour the memories that you've had with your dad.

EN | Sat, 15/08/2009 - 8:11am

thank you for this

thank you for this reminder! my eyes full of tears when i am reading this. Even my father passed away long time ago when i was 17 years old, your blog still remind me of him. it reminds me to spend more time with my mum too. she is now 77 yrs and spending time even harder as we live in different countries. my condolences to you and family. take care!

Jav | Sat, 15/08/2009 - 2:21am

My condolences, Tamarind

Thank you for sharing with us even in difficult times.

Reading your blog made me cry buckets.  My father and I haven't been on good terms for a very long time.  Your story makes me want to go do something with him b4 its too late.  Something I learned:  Its not when you go, its how you go when the time comes.  I m sure your dad is in peace having you by his side in his last days and also enjoyed your love and care for him.

Take care......

MLR | Fri, 14/08/2009 - 10:13pm

My condolences, Tamarind

I'm really sorry, Tamarind.  Thanks for showing us how to love our parents.  Your dad must have been very proud of you.

Be strong - for your kids and your dear mum too!

 

Andaiz | Fri, 14/08/2009 - 5:47pm

Your dad, certainly a happy and achieved parent

I am sure your dad has left knowing he is an achieved dad, everything he can be proud of.

Kudos to you.

ks2me (not verified) | Fri, 14/08/2009 - 5:21pm

My condolences, Tamarind

ks2me, well said!

AnalectsReader | Fri, 14/08/2009 - 10:18pm

Thanks for showing us how

Thanks for showing us how to be a good child.

My condolences dear Tamarind.

You're a strong woman.

KS_me | Fri, 14/08/2009 - 5:16pm

Thanks for the memory

Have enjoyed and benefited alot from your blogs - hiring and managing a maid and now about your trips with your parents.

Thanks for sharing so selflessly about your personal life, lessons learnt and wonderful acts of filial piety. Was crying away when I saw the first photo of your father on his China trip.

I would be so proud to have a child like that!

Thanks.

winth | Fri, 14/08/2009 - 2:00pm

I am touched by your story,

I am touched by your story, especially the part on bringing your dad around China on a wheelchair. I'm sure your dad's life has been enriched greatly by your selfless love to care for him in his last days.

You, take care of yourself and stay strong.

csc | Fri, 14/08/2009 - 10:15am

Tamarind, my

Tamarind, my condolences.

Reading your blog has brought back very painful memories fo me. I lost my father a year ago and till today, it is hard for me to talk about it. The illness took him away very quickly as it was less than a month between diagnosis and his death. While we had expected it because of the prognosis, we were still not prepared that he would leave us so soon. One day, he was still walking around the house and the next day, we had a call to say that he has gone. It was very hard for the family and still is at times. The only consolation was that he did not have to suffer till the end.

You managed to spend a lot of quality time with your father and that is what matters. It will be hard but do be strong. To quote a book "Tough times don't last, but tough people do."

acforfamily | Fri, 14/08/2009 - 10:11am

My condolence to you,

My condolence to you, tamarind. You are a nice and filial daughter.

Can sense your grief upon losing your dearest father, as my father has passed away too in 1.5 yrs ago.

Be stronger. Your dearest mother needs your support very much at this moment. Take good care.

 

Funguy71 | Fri, 14/08/2009 - 10:10am

My condolences

My condolences dearest tamarind..

No wonder you were MIA for a while..

I admire your strength.

I am very very close to my daddie.

No matter how strong a person i may

be, i'm very sure it's going to be very

hard for me, if the time came for me..

So am trying my best to spend whatever

time with him and mum together with my girls.

 bÜds

buds | Fri, 14/08/2009 - 9:40am

My condolences

My condolences dearest tamarind..

No wonder you were MIA for a while..

I admire your strength.

I am very very close to my daddie.

No matter how strong a person i may

be, i'm very sure it's going to be very

hard for me, if the time came for me..

So am trying my best to spend whatever

time with him and mum together with my girls.

 bÜds

buds | Fri, 14/08/2009 - 9:37am

You are a strong woman and

You are a strong woman and a very filial daughter.

I wish you well.

jedamum | Fri, 14/08/2009 - 9:11am