Stress for Pupils "often" comes from Parents

General comments and chit-chat, or tell us how we can improve KiasuParents.com

Stress for Pupils "often" comes from Parents

Postby PSLEmom » Tue Oct 26, 2010 9:16 am

There was a short article on today's ST (Pg B6) on Singapore Education System titled :
STRESS for Pupils often COMES from PARENTS.

Dear Moms & Dads, what wd be your say????
:oops: or :x or :P or :wink:

PSLEmom
GreenBelt
GreenBelt
 
Posts: 136
Joined: Mon Jan 04, 2010 5:06 pm
Total Likes: 0


Postby cherrygal » Tue Oct 26, 2010 2:39 pm

AGREE. Sometimes we need to take a step back and look at the successful people who weren't from branded schools or don't hold professional certs. Look at the businessmen. These people may not have had the best education but they are the ones with real money. Compared to them, the doctors, lawyers etc earn peanuts.

We should supervise our kids to do well enough but if the kids have limitations, then we must know when to stop the pressure. Some people are just not study material. It is the parent who must then decide to help the child find a niche skill such as cooking, hairstyling etc.

We gotta read Rich Dad Poor Dad more often and also look at ourselves. If we are not doctors, how can we expect our kids to be doctors?

cherrygal
KiasuGrandMaster
KiasuGrandMaster
 
Posts: 2886
Joined: Thu Aug 06, 2009 1:01 am
Total Likes: 13


Postby peterch » Tue Oct 26, 2010 2:45 pm

I think it is natural that most of the parents would push the kids beyond the limit as most parents realize that living is not easy in years to come. So the kids must be really well prepared.

But, we are supposed to know what is our kids limit. Can't force them too far beyond as well :D

peterch
BrownBelt
BrownBelt
 
Posts: 643
Joined: Mon Aug 03, 2009 10:03 am
Total Likes: 0


Postby myWQ » Wed Oct 27, 2010 2:44 pm

Yes, totally agree. Parents play a big role in influencing a child, esp at that young age. Many parents play the 'aggressive' role and dictate what, when, how a child should do, but not many play the 'supporting' role, that is to listen to what the child needs and support it.

myWQ
OrangeBelt
OrangeBelt
 
Posts: 63
Joined: Mon May 03, 2010 3:28 pm
Total Likes: 0


Postby Sun_2010 » Wed Oct 27, 2010 5:16 pm

myWQ wrote: Many parents play the 'aggressive' role and dictate what, when, how a child should do, but not many play the 'supporting' role, that is to listen to what the child needs and support it.


U hit the nail right on the head!

It is the later that we should be focusing on ....

Sun_2010
KiasuGrandMaster
KiasuGrandMaster
 
Posts: 4613
Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2010 2:13 pm
Total Likes: 145



Postby sleepy » Wed Oct 27, 2010 5:24 pm

cherrygal wrote: If we are not doctors, how can we expect our kids to be doctors?


Hehe, if we are doctors, can expect kids to be doctors ? :lol:

sleepy
KiasuGrandMaster
KiasuGrandMaster
 
Posts: 9068
Joined: Thu Aug 14, 2008 6:21 pm
Total Likes: 34


Postby Guest » Wed Oct 27, 2010 7:40 pm

sleepy wrote:
cherrygal wrote: If we are not doctors, how can we expect our kids to be doctors?


Hehe, if we are doctors, can expect kids to be doctors ? :lol:


Yes, you can expect because you know how to get there and coach them but whether the child wants to follow is always a parent's challenge, at least you are equipped to expect. Quite typical to find a family of doctors.

I agree with cherrygal, if we don't know how, at best just give the support but cannot expect them to become what we do not know how to become (especially for higher order stuff).

If the child wants to break barriers with parents' support, not stress, then that is ideal and the bonus.
Guest
 

Postby PSLEmom » Wed Oct 27, 2010 8:25 pm

Doctor's child/children becoming doctors depend upon how successful the parent(s) was/were able to instill/inculcate the passion for that particular career if they really want their off-springs to follow their foot steps. This applies not only to Doctors but to other professions too. I know of families where neither the mother want the kids to be doctors nor the kids!!! :wink: In Singapore where do our children get a chance of follow their dreams & passions??? :cry:

PSLEmom
GreenBelt
GreenBelt
 
Posts: 136
Joined: Mon Jan 04, 2010 5:06 pm
Total Likes: 0


Postby ChiefKiasu » Thu Oct 28, 2010 1:02 am

cherrygal wrote:... If we are not doctors, how can we expect our kids to be doctors?


Good point. But as sleepy has put it so succinctly, the antithesis is that if we are doctors, we will expect our children to be doctors.

Herein lies the root of the stress. Our generation has been so high achieving that we expect our descendents to be of similar and higher calibre. I don't recall my parents having the same kind of stress that my wife and I are having with our children. It's because they never had the chance to go through formal education and hence do not know what to expect.

ChiefKiasu
Site Admin
 
Posts: 15221
Joined: Mon Sep 03, 2007 9:16 am
Location: Singapore
Total Likes: 319


Postby sleepy » Thu Oct 28, 2010 2:11 pm

ChiefKiasu wrote:Good point. But as sleepy has put it so succinctly, the antithesis is that if we are doctors, we will expect our children to be doctors.

Herein lies the root of the stress. Our generation has been so high achieving that we expect our descendents to be of similar and higher calibre. I don't recall my parents having the same kind of stress that my wife and I are having with our children. It's because they never had the chance to go through formal education and hence do not know what to expect.



:goodpost:


I looked up dictionary for these 2 words. My inklish no good wor :sweat:

sleepy
KiasuGrandMaster
KiasuGrandMaster
 
Posts: 9068
Joined: Thu Aug 14, 2008 6:21 pm
Total Likes: 34


Next

Return to Recess Time