So angry, be warn, this is a rant session

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So angry, be warn, this is a rant session

Postby SAHM_TAN » Wed Apr 27, 2011 8:30 pm

So angry :x :x :x After our dinner, my DD told me a classmate (girl) in kindy said to her "you are so stupid" 2 times :x :x :x .

I know the words come out of a child but what kind of a child call another person stupid and so stupid at that?

I asked my DD how she felt and if she believe the girl's comment. She said she was sad but do not believe the girl's comment. I want to :cry:

My DD do not know why the girl made such a comment to her and 2 times some more. Whatever the circumstances, there's no excuse for such a comment to be made. It was not said in jest.

I just need to vent.

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Re: So angry, be warn, this is a rant session

Postby hope76 » Wed Apr 27, 2011 9:07 pm

SAHM_TAN wrote:So angry :x :x :x After our dinner, my DD told me a classmate (girl) in kindy said to her "you are so stupid" 2 times :x :x :x .

I know the words come out of a child but what kind of a child call another person stupid and so stupid at that?

I asked my DD how she felt and if she believe the girl's comment. She said she was sad but do not believe the girl's comment. I want to :cry:

My DD do not know why the girl made such a comment to her and 2 times some more. Whatever the circumstances, there's no excuse for such a comment to be made. It was not said in jest.

I just need to vent.


Hi, can fully understand how u feel. My son was playing at the pool and a boy wanted to borrow his squirt. As my son was playing with it so he told him 'no'. The boy scolded my son stupid and idiot for not lending. I was there watching it and can't believed what I heard.

So I went over and asked the boy where's his mum so I can speak to her. When the mum came over, I told her what happened. Instead of apologizing, she said it's ok to her boy. And she just walked again after that.

I was furious. Both my son and the boy are abt 5 plus only. I felt like scolding her but my son was with me cos he was crying and upset with the little boy words. I decided to just walked away, just in case I can't control my temper and end up quarreling with her and set a bad example for my son... :(

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Re: So angry, be warn, this is a rant session

Postby 3Boys » Wed Apr 27, 2011 9:16 pm

:?

Am I alone in thinking its not a real big deal?

Small kids aren't always careful or aware about what they say, so I don't think we need to be too harsh on them. Yes, its not nice, but nobody got hurt. I tell my kids to ignore and if continues, to avoid. Some of my boys' closest friends in school, in a fit of pique, have acted and said worse things. The way I see it, the important thing is to teach our own children to see it in context, not feel hurt, and ride out the storms.

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Re: So angry, be warn, this is a rant session

Postby hope76 » Wed Apr 27, 2011 9:26 pm

3Boys wrote::?

Am I alone in thinking its not a real big deal?

Small kids aren't always careful or aware about what they say, so I don't think we need to be too harsh on them. Yes, its not nice, but nobody got hurt. I tell my kids to ignore and if continues, to avoid. Some of my boys' closest friends in school, in a fit of pique, have acted and said worse things. The way I see it, the important thing is to teach our own children to see it in context, not feel hurt, and ride out the storms.


Actually I'm not angry with the boy who scolded my ds. He is a kid afterall. Just surprised that at such young age, he is using such words.

I'm angry with the mum who don't even offer a word of apology and just walked away after telling her son it's ok. Is this the way to teach our kids? Maybe I'm being idealistic cos that lady seems very educated. If my ds was the one who used such words to scold others, he will definitely be punished by us and we would appreciate the other parent who feedback to us. At least I can teach my kids what are the no so nice words to use.
Last edited by hope76 on Wed Apr 27, 2011 9:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: So angry, be warn, this is a rant session

Postby jedamum » Wed Apr 27, 2011 9:29 pm

Yours is a firstborn? Naturally, we mothers feel more protective towards firstborn. I get heated up easily with the slightest injustice that my ds1 encounter. But with my secondborn, so long he is in no danger of being physically hurt, I very much leave him to settle things with his playmates (unless the playmates are much older). Once, I was sitting in a distance and ds2 was playing at the playground with a boy. That boy must have said the word 'stupid' because my ds2 suddenly shouted out loudly,"My mummy said cannot say the word 'STUPID'! or hor....I tell my mother!". That boy's mother was so embarrassed.
Even if I meet such parents, I will not get very much angry for their non-actions. I will merely tell myself that either they are really ignorant, or that they will be hit 10times harder when their child eventually grow up to be of that nature.

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Re: So angry, be warn, this is a rant session

Postby hope76 » Wed Apr 27, 2011 9:37 pm

jedamum wrote:Yours is a firstborn? Naturally, we mothers feel more protective towards firstborn. I get heated up easily with the slightest injustice that my ds1 encounter. But with my secondborn, so long he is in no danger of being physically hurt, I very much leave him to settle things with his playmates (unless the playmates are much older). Once, I was sitting in a distance and ds2 was playing at the playground with a boy. That boy must have said the word 'stupid' because my ds2 suddenly shouted out loudly,"My mummy said cannot say the word 'STUPID'! or hor....I tell my mother!". That boy's mother was so embarrassed.
Even if I meet such parents, I will not get very much angry for their non-actions. I will merely tell myself that either they are really ignorant, or that they will be hit 10times harder when their child eventually grow up to be of that nature.


Yup, my ds is firstborn. U r right. I have higher expectations from him and more protective compared to my the other 2. I am hoping that if the eldest can set the right example, the other 2 will follow suit.

Again, i may be too idealistic. Haha.

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Re: So angry, be warn, this is a rant session

Postby sleepy » Wed Apr 27, 2011 11:15 pm

dd's kindy classmate taught her this reply

say people 'xx', you also 'xx'

seems to work :evil:

sleepy
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Re: So angry, be warn, this is a rant session

Postby Funz » Thu Apr 28, 2011 10:21 am

3Boys wrote::?

Am I alone in thinking its not a real big deal?

Small kids aren't always careful or aware about what they say, so I don't think we need to be too harsh on them. Yes, its not nice, but nobody got hurt. I tell my kids to ignore and if continues, to avoid. Some of my boys' closest friends in school, in a fit of pique, have acted and said worse things. The way I see it, the important thing is to teach our own children to see it in context, not feel hurt, and ride out the storms.


You're not alone. I have the same thoughts.

I feel that we as parents should try to down play incidents like that especially if they are once off incidents. If the child is being picked on and constantly being told that by that particular friend then it is a different story.

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Re: So angry, be warn, this is a rant session

Postby 3Boys » Thu Apr 28, 2011 10:25 am

Funz wrote:
3Boys wrote::?

Am I alone in thinking its not a real big deal?

Small kids aren't always careful or aware about what they say, so I don't think we need to be too harsh on them. Yes, its not nice, but nobody got hurt. I tell my kids to ignore and if continues, to avoid. Some of my boys' closest friends in school, in a fit of pique, have acted and said worse things. The way I see it, the important thing is to teach our own children to see it in context, not feel hurt, and ride out the storms.


You're not alone. I have the same thoughts.

I feel that we as parents should try to down play incidents like that especially if they are once off incidents. If the child is being picked on and constantly being told that by that particular friend then it is a different story.


Yes, I think they can take a bit of rough and tumble, and we don't have to be over-protective. Of course, harassment and bullying is a different story.

3Boys
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Re: So angry, be warn, this is a rant session

Postby LKVM » Thu Apr 28, 2011 10:30 am

I also believe that once we give too much importance to these things kids will be more unhappy just tell them to ignore...

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