NEED ADVICE - HOW MOST FAMILIES COPE: FINDING CAREGIVER

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NEED ADVICE - HOW MOST FAMILIES COPE: FINDING CAREGIVER

Postby jass » Sun Jun 14, 2009 8:17 am

Dear daddies & mummies

Need your most precious advice

My hubby & I are self-employed & work long hrs.

We ve 2kids - 6 and 3yrs old.

We re wondering how most parents cope. Is it advisable to get domestic helper? Is it safe to leave 6year old with her after sch (Pri 1 next year)?

Our parents are looking after our siblings children in the day, in the evenings they will do their own stuff.

My K2 and 3yr old are currently in full-day childcare.

But noticed that - will ve prob next year as there will be june and dec holidays. we will need caregiver in these 2 mths.

How do most parents cope?

We had maids before but it is really tough to trust them.

We treat them like family, but was not recipocrated.

Do u install cameras to check? Horror stories are deterent to our re-employmt plans.

Heard of 1 unfortunate case that the maid accused the employer of abuse when is not true.
They re facing charges now.

Dear experienced parents, u ve taken this path before, what did u do?

Tx so much again

jass
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Postby EN » Sun Jun 14, 2009 9:16 am

My K2 and 3yr old are currently in full-day childcare.

But noticed that - will ve prob next year as there will be june and dec holidays. we will need caregiver in these 2 mths.


My kids were placed in childcare during their growing up period. There weren't any closure during June and Dec holidays. The closure will either be due to HFMD or their company retreat/meeting which usually doesn't last more than 3 days & it happen only like once or twice a year.

But problems will occur if both parents are needed to work beyond the child care hours (mine closed at 7pm).

When my kids are able to communicate well, I stopped the childcare and took a maid. Some horrible, some nice. Depending on luck. If you want to know more about maid, please refer to this http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/forum ... .php?t=903

EN
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Postby sleepy » Sun Jun 14, 2009 9:32 am

For primary school kids, there's student care. The child goes student care for half day, the other half day spend in primary school.
During school holiday the child stays full day in student care. Very similar to childcare center

sleepy
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Postby EN » Sun Jun 14, 2009 9:55 am

For primary school kids, there's student care. The child goes student care for half day, the other half day spend in primary school.
During school holiday the child stays full day in student care. Very similar to childcare center


:oops: Yikes! I missed the K2 going to P1 statement. Good catch sleepy. You must be very much awake now. It's me who is sleepy. :lol:

EN
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Postby winth » Mon Jun 15, 2009 12:14 pm

Hi jass,

We face the same problem like you too! :D

Both of us are working and my 6 year old will attend P1 next year, while my 2 year old will be in full day care.

After much deliberation (we had 2 month maid horror half year back :x), we have decided to try on having a maid again. But this time, we've come very much prepared 8). Now that I'm still working from home, we will use the few remaining months to watch over and train her. If not good, won't even hesitate changing her. We've interviewed several transferred maids and got ourselves someone I AM very comfortable with and she's a Buddhist (to handle all my Buddha altar items). And oh, we were very uncomfortable with the previous maid (looks wise) but the profile was shoved to us bec it was thru internal recommendation by fellow-maid. She kept saying that maid's good (maybe what she meant was: good at idling/sleeping/pinching and threathening sons/bad-mouthing/act blur)! Ya...

Our children still go to full day childcare, maid is responsible for all nitty gritty housechores in the house. We will make the maid walk (2 bus stops away) to school to fetch them at 5:30pm and by the time she's home with the kids, I will need to be back (at 6:30pm) or maybe slightly later and cook dinner for them.

I won't trust the maid to cook but she will prepare all the ingredients for me.
I won't trust the maid to take care of the children for prolonged period (at most she will be with them alone for only 1 hour before I come home).
In that hour, I have listed down in detail what she's supposed to do with them so that she won't go blank.

We are installing cameras to check on her over the internet.
We are going to call home to check on her every 2 hours when I'm start working in office.
It was partly our fault with our previous maid bec we trusted that she had the common sense to do all the housechores based on our timetable given to her and she can complete them unsupervised/or know what we expected of her. How we know common sense is so un-common!

Before that, we have considered hiring part-time maid/part-time local nannies to go fetch them at DS2 at childcare and DS1 at student care (they are just across the road) so that it won't be a mad-rush for me after office. Then have part-time maid to help us clean the house (which is what we are doing now). But the cost is not cheap, plus we need to have school bus to ferry, pay for childcare & student care, pay for 2 part-time helpers and not to mention all the coordination required with various different parties! Plus, I still need to rush home and prepare and cook, bec we simply refuse to get ourselves tingkat food, and do all the cleaning up after dinner! *Phew* Was so tired to even think about it! Plus can you imagine that if child/ren sick and childcare refuse to take them in? It happens quite often to DS2.

Hiring a maid was the only way out for us. We searched for good maid agencies to serve us. They've got to have local bosses so that they are pro-employers should we need to handle anything nasty. My friend has recommended 'Best Home' at Thomson Plaza and after talking to them, yep, they are professional enuff. They even have a history of scolding and threatening the maids when maids are brought back for transfers. My friend had a case when the maid admitted to stealing, brought back to agency, accuse my friend back that she was abused and didn't steal at all. That agency scolded and threatened the maid in front of my friend until the maid came out clean with her.

Even the one at Bukit Timah was quite alright. We've checked out many other agencies beforehand before settling for this one. We even brought back a dozen shortlisted profiles and sit down for family discussions with our current tenant for maid opinions and had several brain-storming sessions. 8)

winth
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Postby JR mum » Thu Jul 02, 2009 2:27 pm

Hi Winth,

My situation is very similar to yours. I am also contemplating to send my 7 year dd to student care and my 18mos ds to full day childcare. But heard some ugly feedback about student care being not conducive for young children. A lot of bad habits will be picked up from there. And in sending my 18mos old ds to full day childcare, I am concerned about exposing him to viruses at this young age.

Of course, like yours and most parents concern, leaving them alone with the domestic helper is also a key concern....

As such, I am in a fix too.

Jass - for your case, if both you and your hubby are self-employed, wont it be possible for you to come back home every few hours to check? Not too sure if thats feasible.

JR mum
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