成功之道

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成功之道

Postby insider » Wed Feb 05, 2014 9:50 pm

I have been extremely busy recently coz I am trying to close a deal that if I manage to, I can retire comfortably (remark: my 'comfort level' is ok ok standard coz I dont need big house and big car and don't need to leave much for my kiddos).

I have to handle tons of documents almost single handedly, working like till wanna get myself choked.

One weekend, I needed to print out a few thousand pages of info and I figured I needed extra help from an 'outsider' for collating job.

I couldn't use my son coz he is not careful enough. So, I texted my nieces, telling them that Ah Yi needed help urgently for a few hours and that Ah Yi had been working till hand hurt (typed till hand literally gonna break).

One (23 years old, final year Biz student) replied said she oredi had appointment for lunch with friends. Sorli Ah Yi!

Another one (20 years old, 1st year Biz student), replied said she needed to pack her room (CNY was then coming).

Basically both rejected my 'plea'.

I was kind of disappointed coz all these years I have treated them very well and I have not asked them for a single favour before, and they rejected my never-done-before-plea-for-help.

Disappointment aside, I looked at the matter more objectively and somehow concluded that these two girls will not go too far in their future careers due to:

1. a lack of 'helpfulness' and a sense of putting others before self when a situation requires so;

2. a poor judgment of 贵人 who is right in front of them. I am someone who if you give me a drop, I will return you a pail when the time comes. From the way they rejected me, I sort of can foresee they may miss out other similar 贵人 like me at the later part of their lives.

Study smart with good grades and landed in a proper job is just such a small part of a 'success' equation. The easier way is to meet the right ('useful') person and then can have a higher probability to take a shorter cut to 'success'.

Actually there's no way to learn how to recognise a 贵人, and the only way is to help whoever one can coz anyone whom you help can be a 贵人 at the end. At least this happens to me so frequently that I have so many 贵人 in my life just coz I always help whenever I can, almost like regardless to who (incl of people whom i used to dislike).

I am not the petty kind. If I were the petty kind, then my nieces would have missed someone who is willing to sponsor them for their overseas post grad degrees (my sis can't afford but they have been dreaming of can do a post grad overseas after their first degree).

It is difficult to be 'selfless' in this complicated world but from my experiences, being 'selfless' really pays at the end of the day...

insider
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Re: 成功之道

Postby Imami » Wed Feb 05, 2014 9:59 pm

Insider,

祝马年行大运,身体健康,笑口常开,心想事成!

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Re: 成功之道

Postby insider » Wed Feb 05, 2014 10:08 pm

I spoke to my 11 years old son over the dinner just.

I told him mummy recently then realised that I am such a smart woman and I don't think he can be in anyway smarter than me in the future if I can still keep my memory.

He asked why.

I told him coz his life is too comfortable that he doesn't really need to crack his head to solve real life problems.

Then he retorted, saying such 'comfortable life' is not his fault wat...

Yah, I have to admit I cannot duplicate my childhood hardships for him to experience and without such experiences, he can never gain the same amount of knowledge and skills in problem solving like I can.

In this fast internet and whatever world, wisdom is dying. Most kids are fed with so much useless info, with brains over crowded with unnecessary rubbish for proper internal thinking and feeling and processing. Kids seem to know a lot but they know so minimally about 如何做人 - which is the key foundation of success (in achieving happiness).

insider
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Re: 成功之道

Postby PiggyLalala » Wed Feb 05, 2014 10:10 pm

Hi insider,
Thank you for the post. Will share it with ds2. Agree with you 贵人is very important in life.

祝你新年快乐, 事事顺心。

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Re: 成功之道

Postby starlight1968sg » Wed Feb 05, 2014 10:14 pm

May I add besides 贵人, hardworking and having that opportunity are quite important in order to be successful?

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Re: 成功之道

Postby insider » Wed Feb 05, 2014 10:18 pm

Imami wrote:Insider,

祝马年行大运,身体健康,笑口常开,心想事成



Hello Imami

恭喜恭喜!

My '心想事成' comes again!

I was having this thought about a 'big deal' and then this rich person just knocked on my door and asked for the deal! (and made me so busy.)

Everything is so smooth for me that I feel so glad.

I am going to be 'rich' soon and once I get my money, I will split part of it with my 5 siblings.

I told my mum I am forever grateful to them (I think I shared somewhere that almost like all of them 'couldn't study' and the only sum of money that my dad had was invested in me for my overseas education; that they 'sacrificed' themselves to 成就 me. Now the $40,000 that my dad gave me for my overseas study donkey years ago has multiplied into several tens of folds, and this may not be possible if any of my siblings had 'fought' with me the only sum of money that the family had).

Ever entertained the thought of 'retirement' but then discarded it aside coz think I am too 'useful' to retire at this age. Shall continue to make more money to share with people whom need. (I just have this darn confidence that whatever I touch will turn into Gold somehow. It's not so much about 'conceited' but a 'realisation' that I really have the 'power' to 心想事成!)

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Re: 成功之道

Postby Imami » Wed Feb 05, 2014 10:27 pm

是呀,近几个月我也有心想事成。小事小事。但心想就有。这两天遇到了难题,希望能找到灵感•••
Last edited by Imami on Thu Feb 06, 2014 10:49 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: 成功之道

Postby insider » Wed Feb 05, 2014 10:37 pm

PiggyLalala wrote:Hi insider,
Thank you for the post. Will share it with ds2. Agree with you 贵人is very important in life.

祝你新年快乐, 事事顺心。



祝你身体健康,Piggylalala!

I shared with my daughter in UK about how my nieces rejected my urgent plea to help.

I could imagine she was grinding her teeth and she typed that how they could be so 'ungrateful'.

I could understand her fury coz she saw how many times I rescued my nieces from 'fire'.

Then, I told her to tame the fire in her coz my nieces had just 'demonstrated' a real life scene for her to learn a valuable lesson and so, she has to 'thank' them.

My daughter is 21 this year, filled with the usual 年轻人的愤怒. I told her if she can tame this fire the sooner, the earlier she can sow all the good 'seeds' of understanding and kind thoughts.

My daughter is easier to 'teach', coz she sort of take my words as 'Bible' = she 少走弯路。

It is not easy to 'teach' kids how to stand above a situation to look at the whole picture instead of just being entangled with the parts but given enough scenario, the kids may realise the importance of such 'metaphase' subsequently...

insider
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Re: 成功之道

Postby insider » Wed Feb 05, 2014 10:50 pm

starlight1968sg wrote:May I add besides 贵人, hardworking and having that opportunity are quite important in order to be successful?


hardworking is a pre-requisite towards success (unless one is born with a silver spoon).

but hardworking is not as important as 会做人. When I said 会做人, i dont mean the boot-licking kind; it's more like know when to extend a hand and when not to / when to talk and when not to / etc.

also 'hardworking' should not be confined to only schoolwork. As long as a child is hardworking over something (such as a passion), then with that mentality is enough.

You mentioned about 'opportunity', 'opportunity' comes together with 贵人.

My elder son is naturally 心胸广阔, so he naturally 会做人 (seldom gets upset, forgiving, helpful, etc). Despite mediocre results, he attracts many 贵人 to him. He met one of the most famous 'light masters' (not sure the actual job title but basically is the main 'light controller' in any movie-making scene) who likes him enough and put him directly under his mentorship = this 师傅 will bring my son for on site shoots whenever my son is free. Under his mentorship, my son's 'market value' raised from $50/day to $250/day. He is only 19.

I don't classify my son's encounter as pure 'luck' but rather will attribute it to the positive energy around him that attracts positive things...

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Re: 成功之道

Postby starlight1968sg » Wed Feb 05, 2014 10:52 pm

Thanks insider for sharing your insights.
I have none :(

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