I feel yuan wang! I am misunderstood as being snobbish

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kaitlynangelica
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Post by kaitlynangelica » Thu Mar 11, 2010 1:10 pm

auntieM wrote:Hi kaitlynangelica,
To answer your questions....
She's jealous cause my DH is more successful than hers.
She wanted to try putting her DS in a better school together with her Taitai friends but her hubby said no.....now those taitai :siam: her.
She left her kids to the 2 maids at home and they turn out kinda problematic.....Thus having problem at school.
So my son having fun at P1 didn't go well with her...

It's good to be able to rant here :wink:


why did hubby say no?

If they got two maids, can't be doing that badly right? I don't think leaving them to the maids means they will turn out problematice.

Oh well...........................

auntieM
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Post by auntieM » Thu Mar 11, 2010 1:17 pm

Her hubby just want a nearby school leh......
They are doing very well, but bochap SAHM with 2 maids that gets changed every few months is not good for the kids...
The couple have frequent fights too

Blobbi
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Post by Blobbi » Thu Mar 11, 2010 8:00 pm

BeautifulLife wrote:... friends are friends cos we have certain chemistry isn't it? I guess it is simply about how we can be more sensitive so as not to let any party feel being put down. ...I really do not think it matters. There are definitely more things that we look out for when befriending people.



Completely agree with you, BeautifulLife.

tutormum
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Post by tutormum » Thu Mar 11, 2010 10:49 pm

auntieM wrote:Hi kaitlynangelica,
To answer your questions....
She's jealous cause my DH is more successful than hers.
She wanted to try putting her DS in a better school together with her Taitai friends but her hubby said no.....now those taitai :siam: her.
She left her kids to the 2 maids at home and they turn out kinda problematic.....Thus having problem at school.
So my son having fun at P1 didn't go well with her...

It's good to be able to rant here :wink:
:!: :!: What does she do everyday? I'll give anything to have 2 maids in the house so that I can spend all my time with my kids. Well, I never compare how successful or failure DH is compared to my friends' DH. :roll: In fact, I don't compare with anybody at all. ren bi ren qi si ren. My motto is: to be happy with what I have. I won't die having less and won't prolong my life if I have more. :wink: DH is more materialistic and likes to show off. I always tell him that no matter how big a house he lives in, he always sleep on a bed every night. :P

auntieM
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Post by auntieM » Thu Mar 11, 2010 11:53 pm

Hi tutormum,
She busy with TV drama DVD ,SPA and shares lar.
Same same, I don't like to compare...and my DH is the 'howlian' one!
I literally got to kick his leg under table to stop him from yakking away! :wink:


kaitlynangelica
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Post by kaitlynangelica » Fri Mar 12, 2010 5:12 pm

BeautifulLife wrote: :shock: My circle of friends (all SAHM) are made up of different background. My DH makes 17k monthly, I have friends whose DH make more than 20k, 10k, 6k and below 3k. I do not see any problem mixing with either group. I mean, friends are friends cos we have certain chemistry isn't it? I guess it is simply about how we can be more sensitive so as not to let any party feel being put down. Of course the topics that we talk about differs. With the group of friends that are doing quite well, we discuss about the latest bag that we have and the places we would like to visit during the holidays. With the group that are doing just decently, we do not touch on the same topics. I really do not think it matters. There are definitely more things that we look out for when befriending people.

I can sense that you really feel wronged. Guess I do understand how you feel. What about you put yourself into your friend's shoes? There she is struggling quite a bit with her life whilst listening to you sharing with her how well things are over your side. Definitely no wrong on your part. It is just that it may not go down well on her at this very moment. Since you mentioned she is a close friend of yours, I think we must have the faith that she does feel happy for you that things are looking bright over your side. It is just that she may be totally drained off by her problems at this moment. Does it help you to feel better?



Beautiful life,

Don't get me wrong. I have friends from all walks of life too. What I meant was u have to be careful about what topics u talk about with diff ppl. But seriously, I didn't think this person was doing too badly. Def not like those families in "Life Transformers".

kaitlynangelica
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Post by kaitlynangelica » Fri Mar 12, 2010 5:12 pm

:shock: My circle of friends (all SAHM) are made up of different background. My DH makes 17k monthly, I have friends whose DH make more than 20k, 10k, 6k and below 3k. I do not see any problem mixing with either group. I mean, friends are friends cos we have certain chemistry isn't it? I guess it is simply about how we can be more sensitive so as not to let any party feel being put down. Of course the topics that we talk about differs. With the group of friends that are doing quite well, we discuss about the latest bag that we have and the places we would like to visit during the holidays. With the group that are doing just decently, we do not touch on the same topics. I really do not think it matters. There are definitely more things that we look out for when befriending people.

I can sense that you really feel wronged. Guess I do understand how you feel. What about you put yourself into your friend's shoes? There she is struggling quite a bit with her life whilst listening to you sharing with her how well things are over your side. Definitely no wrong on your part. It is just that it may not go down well on her at this very moment. Since you mentioned she is a close friend of yours, I think we must have the faith that she does feel happy for you that things are looking bright over your side. It is just that she may be totally drained off by her problems at this moment. Does it help you to feel better?[/quote]


Beautiful life,

Don't get me wrong. I have friends from all walks of life too. What I meant was we have to be careful about what topics we talk about with diff ppl. But seriously, I didn't think this person was doing too badly. Def not like those families in "Life Transformers".

mocharita
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Re: I feel yuan wang! I am misunderstood as being snobbish

Post by mocharita » Fri Mar 12, 2010 11:34 pm

kaitlynangelica wrote:Anybody ever felt that way?

Today I was talking to my colleague over lunch. Suddenly she turned round to me and said that I will never understand a family's difficulty of not being able to pay fees. I told her point blank that I was personally very offended. Yes I may have grown up in a more privileged family. Is that my fault? Is it snobbish of me to have sent my child to an elite school in Bukit Timah? Is it wrong of me to talk about enrichment classes? Was it a crime to have had a slightly better childhood financially? does it mean I have to please others all the time, watch my back and think twice about everything I say? Life will be awfully tiring right? And is it wrong to share that my parents are educated, graduates to be exact. I am not doing exactly well myself. I had my fair share of emotional hardships growing up as well.

Just ranting..............I felt so hurt when Ms xxx said that I had a way of making her feel like thrash.

I take pride that I am a well brought-up person, parents having thought me the value of money and made sure that I knew poverty existed.


Well, admit to her that you will never understand a family’s difficulties. Simply, and honestly you didn’t come from an under privileged family. You don’t have to please anyone, all you need is to be sensitive towards the less privileged by giving less of your opinions because they will not believe your opinions in the first place since they already see you as ‘upper’ than them. Tough, I know., but what to do, that’s the way they chose to think. You can’t make everyone happy about themselves, right??!? As long as you don’t belittle them (God forbids), they can feel little all they want because of their tiny egos. Little people like to make bigger people feel guilty of their size. Don’t fall for it. As long as you don’t belittle those who under you, envy but not jealous of those above you, you will be A-Okay! ;-)

mathsparks
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Post by mathsparks » Sat Mar 13, 2010 2:14 pm

Honestly feel strange that some folks here know how much their friends' dhs earn.

My friends n I dont talk abt our hubby's salaries. We dont talk abt our salaries either. Heck, we dont care to know what job/company their husbands are in. And where I come from (perhaps another planet), it's considered how lian to tell the world how much yr income is. Dont :heresmyfish: or :torchme: , it's just my personal opinion.

And regarding havg to watch wat u say, I strongly believe in empathy for the people around u.

kiddo
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Post by kiddo » Mon Mar 15, 2010 1:31 am

mathsparks wrote:Honestly feel strange that some folks here know how much their friends' dhs earn.

My friends n I dont talk abt our hubby's salaries. We dont talk abt our salaries either. Heck, we dont care to know what job/company their husbands are in. And where I come from (perhaps another planet), it's considered how lian to tell the world how much yr income is. Dont :heresmyfish: or :torchme: , it's just my personal opinion.

And regarding havg to watch wat u say, I strongly believe in empathy for the people around u.


well said Mathsparks :hugs: i came from the same planet u just drop in from the spaceship :rotflmao:

Empathy we need a loads loads and loads esp in SG as we progress where many may have been left behind through no fault of theirs.....

let just be friends and keep others issue out esp the materially unless real necessary ..... :lol: :wink: :pray:

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