Daughter wants to stop learning piano

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Daughter wants to stop learning piano

Postby red_ryder » Thu Oct 29, 2009 11:06 am

Hi all. My daughter is 6 yrs old, and has been learning piano since she was 5. She hasn’t taken the Grade 1 exam yet. She seems to be losing interest in learning, refusing to practice and asking us to stop the lessons. I don’t want to force her, but at the same time I don’t want her to regret this later in life. I know a few people who regretted not learning a musical instrument when young. Also it seems a waste to throw away 1 yrs worth of lessons just like that.

She was the one who asked for piano lessons at 5 yrs old. She used to love banging away at the piano ever since she was a toddler, but apparently not anymore. What should I do?

red_ryder
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Postby kiasuproductscout » Thu Oct 29, 2009 11:18 am

might want to talk to her to find out why...is the teaching style not suitable for her?

kiasuproductscout
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Postby red_ryder » Thu Oct 29, 2009 11:20 am

She just says its too hard, and refuses to elaborate.

Sometimes I think she's just lazy :D

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Postby tamarind » Thu Oct 29, 2009 11:47 am

If my kids say they have no interest in learning piano, then I am more than happy, don't need to spend the money.

Actually why does so many parents think that learning piano is essential ? I never have the chance to learn piano because my parents could not afford it. I may learn piano when my kids grow up. It is never too late to learn anything. I have no regrets. In fact, I am more than happy to just listen to music.

Only reading and writing is both English and Chinese, as well as all the subjects they need to study in school are essential and non-negotiable. For me, computer skills, not just knowing how to use the computer, but know how to write software using a programming language, is more important for earning a living. For me, piano is purely for pleasure only.

tamarind
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Postby csb » Thu Oct 29, 2009 11:51 am

red_ryder wrote:She just says its too hard, and refuses to elaborate.

Sometimes I think she's just lazy :D


Hi, my son's the same too. Luckily, he has not requested to stop the lessons. But you'd be able to observe if your girl's enjoying the music. It's almost a daily battle to get ds to practise but once he start to practise, he's quite serious. Sometimes I even hear him humming the tune as he practises :D

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Postby jedamum » Thu Oct 29, 2009 11:58 am

red_ryder wrote:She just says its too hard, and refuses to elaborate.

Sometimes I think she's just lazy :D


some kids tend to give up when the going gets tough.
my boy used to love (very much) his swimming lessons. lately, when i asked him about it, his response is lukewarm. then i realised that they had begin to swim laps lately and he finds it tiring. he also couldn't get his legs movement correct for the frog style. there are more than one swim style to learn from, so i need to let him know that not perfecting one style is not going to affect his swimming (awards, tests aside la!). endurance-wise, just have to bear with it cos this is just the beginning; practice makes perfect.
so.....encourage her and learn with her if possible. :)

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Postby daisyt » Thu Oct 29, 2009 12:05 pm

Teacher and teaching style are very important. It can either kills the interest or builds up the interest. I experienced this for my dd. This teacher A, who has taught her for about 3 years, killed her interest totally. After changing, the current teacher B brings up her interest back.

Intitially I did not noticed it because I always thought, as long as she goes for exam, pass her exam, thats it. Slowly, I realised, she practised just for the sake of the exam, not the passion or interest. After a few close obervation on the teacher's teaching, I stop her lessons with this teacher A. I gave my girl (12yo) 2 months cooling down period to think it over, if she still wanted to continue. The reason of loosing her interest was teacher A's teaching and attitute, and the low grade piano we having. After 2 months, her answer to us was YES, she wanted to continue. We upgraded our piano and hunt for a teacher. I am so lucky to find a very good teacher, who is very passionate on teaching piano. Before accepting my girl, she asked for a trial/interview with my girl. I find this is good because I can also judge the teacher during the trial. In the end, she accepted my girl and we also accepted her. Compare her with teacher A, the way she teaches, is totally so different. For eg. teacher A teaches for the sake of teaching. When my girl did not practise, she would just keep quiet and go through the motion. Teacher B, once, she sent my girl back because my girl did not practise enough. She said "My job is to teach, not to practise with her." (BTW, she did not charge me for that lesson she sent my girl back).

p/s : please do not ask me or PM me to recommend this teacher B because she is fully booked.

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Postby red_ryder » Thu Oct 29, 2009 12:11 pm

daisyt wrote:Teacher and teaching style are very important. It can either kills the interest or builds up the interest. I experienced this for my dd. This teacher A, who has taught her for about 3 years, killed her interest totally. After changing, the current teacher B brings up her interest back.

Intitially I did not noticed it because I always thought, as long as she goes for exam, pass her exam, thats it. Slowly, I realised, she practised just for the sake of the exam, not the passion or interest. After a few close obervation on the teacher's teaching, I stop her lessons with this teacher A. I gave my girl (12yo) 2 months cooling down period to think it over, if she still wanted to continue. The reason of loosing her interest was teacher A's teaching and attitute, and the low grade piano we having. After 2 months, her answer to us was YES, she wanted to continue. We upgraded our piano and hunt for a teacher. I am so lucky to find a very good teacher, who is very passionate on teaching piano. Before accepting my girl, she asked for a trial/interview with my girl. I find this is good because I can also judge the teacher during the trial. In the end, she accepted my girl and we also accepted her. Compare her with teacher A, the way she teaches, is totally so different. For eg. teacher A teaches for the sake of teaching. When my girl did not practise, she would just keep quiet and go through the motion. Teacher B, once, she sent my girl back because my girl did not practise enough. She said "My job is to teach, not to practise with her." (BTW, she did not charge me for that lesson she sent my girl back).

p/s : please do not ask me or PM me to recommend this teacher B because she is fully booked.


I'm in a chicken & egg situation. Some people have also told me that I need to get a proper piano to sustain interest. I bought one of those $300 Casio keyboards at home, and my daughter practices on that.

The main reason of course is that the cash outlay is not so high, so even if she gives up piano it is not so serious. Also, it doesn't take so much space in my 4rm flat.

red_ryder
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Postby Funz » Thu Oct 29, 2009 12:43 pm

My girl's (6yrs old) interest fluctuates as well. I started her on piano this year. Typical of kids, when she first started, she was very excited and will be at the piano every chance she gets. I have warned her teacher that she is a girl who needs to constantly learn new stuff. If the lessons get too repetitive she loses interest. But learning the piano is not just about recognising the notes and knowing where the keys are. There are the beats, and the nuances, etc and therein lies the challenge. To be able to master that, it takes practise. So far, her teacher has been pretty good at recognising signs of her getting restless or losing interest and she will start introducing new materials the keep DDs interest afloat.

Recently I saw that DD's interest is waning again and when I told her to practise, she does but without interest and she keeps grumbling that she already know the pieces. So I searched youtube for videos of children playing piano and the next time the teacher came by, I requested that the teacher show her the different variations to playing that 1 piece of music. That kinda sparked her interest again.

By showing DD the possible outcome of what she could do if she manage to learn the skill that the teacher is teaching her now helps to motivate her. I acknowledge that what she is trying to learn now is challenging and it is ok to feel frustrated but I am sure that she will be able to get it. And imagine the music that she can play and create if she acquires this skill.

That said, your kid must have some interest in music lah. If not, her time and your money will be better spent in things that is of interest to her.

Funz
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Postby mowmow » Thu Oct 29, 2009 1:39 pm

tamarind wrote:If my kids say they have no interest in learning piano, then I am more than happy, don't need to spend the money.

Actually why does so many parents think that learning piano is essential ? I never have the chance to learn piano because my parents could not afford it. I may learn piano when my kids grow up. It is never too late to learn anything. I have no regrets. In fact, I am more than happy to just listen to music.

Only reading and writing is both English and Chinese, as well as all the subjects they need to study in school are essential and non-negotiable. For me, computer skills, not just knowing how to use the computer, but know how to write software using a programming language, is more important for earning a living. For me, piano is purely for pleasure only.


Learning piano is good to have but not essential. But if one can afford, it is a good interest worth investing and cultivating because I believe it enhances right-brain development as well!

mowmow
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