Keeping toys

Parental influence on children in the first 12 years of their lives have a permanent effect. Unfortunately, children come with no user manual. Each child is different from the other. Discuss how to handle emotional and educational needs of your child here.

Keeping toys

Postby smurf » Sun Nov 14, 2010 10:21 pm

Ds refuses to keep toys, no matter what I said, threaten, scold, beat, etc.
I've threw away toys, stop buying toys, but to no avail. He forgets about it.

What do u do when ur child dun keep their things? :?

smurf
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Re: Keeping toys

Postby daddy2007 » Sun Nov 14, 2010 10:51 pm

smurf wrote:Ds refuses to keep toys, no matter what I said, threaten, scold, beat, etc.
I've threw away toys, stop buying toys, but to no avail. He forgets about it.

What do u do when ur child dun keep their things? :?


My DW taught me that we should not scold but encourage. Praise them when they done it well. It took alot of effort & patience (which is not in me) but I think it works, for alot of things which we want our DD to learn/do

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Postby jedamum » Sun Nov 14, 2010 11:29 pm

smurf,
both my boys keep their toys after playing. my ds1's version of 'keep' is dump it anywhere out of my sight (in his drawer in any box) and then come shouting for me for misplaced items. my ds2 is much neater. he keeps things at the same place that he took it from. i have not trained ds1 in housekeeping earlier cos i was a FTWP. however, i insisted that he must clear the toys in case we damaged it or he hurt himself if accidentally stepped on it etc and hence he just dump it out of my sight. for ds2, there were occasions where he could not find his toys. after several similar incidents, and my constant reminder to keep toys back at their location so that he can find them again next time, he is now a good 'housekeeper' (sometimes i can't find my loose dvds which i left it on top of my dvd player and he can find them cos he 'kept' it for me somewhere :wink:).

maybe you can make it a habit to keep toys after playing. my rules to ds2 is that he cannot start playing the next set of toys/activity set/writing materials if he did not keep the current set. always keep one set first before proceeding to the next.
i don't threaten to throw away toys cos they cost me $. sometimes he will request for me to keep with him. and if he does not keep, i just remove them and i will keep it in the store room until the next time he comes looking for it...then i will remind him that he did not keep and then he 'lost' it and then i will help him find......:wink:

again, i like to teach my boys lesson through books. try to find some on such lessons and read together.

MHO.

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Re: Keeping toys

Postby cnimed » Mon Nov 15, 2010 9:13 am

smurf wrote:Ds refuses to keep toys, no matter what I said, threaten, scold, beat, etc.
I've threw away toys, stop buying toys, but to no avail. He forgets about it.

What do u do when ur child dun keep their things? :?


I tell them I will keep for them - ie. take big plastic bag, dump everything in, and lock up for a week. It motivates them greatly.

But I realised that sometimes they simply have too many things considering that our place is small. I will do housekeeping once in a while - go through their things and pack away things that are less used, or rotate the toys, so that the total amount is more manageable for them. Storage places have to be accessible. DS2 is better at packing things neatly on shelves, ds1 is better at clearing living room - when he starts to pack his toys, he will get sidetracked and start building some contraption halfway through... :|
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Postby RAchelmum » Sun Dec 05, 2010 1:21 am

Start fr young. My 2yr+ had learnt to keep her toys since 18mos. Though not neat but she does know where to put the items in the right compartments.
Lots of praises & encouragement for keeping her toys, give incentives like going to playground or some treats after doing it.

Pretend to step on toys/ hide some to create awareness that untidiness can hurt/ cause inconvenience.

Another gd way is to do together with her, challenge who can do it faster.

I also practise "dumping" if she refuses to do it. Say I will throw in rubbish bin or give away to neighbour kids since she is not interested to take care of them.

Most importantly, easy to use bins or organizers are available for their ease in keeping. Use mid-sized boxes like shoe boxes / plastic containers rather than large ones. Help them to sort out & take out easily for play, hence less mess. Often, when chunks of toys are all thrown in a large chest, the kids are spending more time digging for toys or creating mess.

Classify the toys in different boxes & label if possible eg. Lego blocks in 1, vehicles in 1, musical toys in 1 etc....

Sub-classification eg. Lego Figurines may be packed in another smaller box or zip-lock bag within the Lego box.

Works for me. Though some housekeeping is unavoidable

RAchelmum
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Postby Muffins » Sun Dec 05, 2010 1:41 am

Mum's strategy: Keep toys there, wait till someone trips over it, and then we'll keep it back ourselves.

If we do not keep our toys back ourselves, and have to be forced to do it, it will bring across a sort of rebellious edge, or we would purposely not put our toys back, just to see the reaction of our parents and/or others. If we trip on our own toys, we would realise what a nuisance it is, and put it back ourselves, and remember next time as well....

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Postby smurf » Sun Dec 05, 2010 10:36 pm

Hmm, may work for some, but for ds2, doesn't work at all. :(

smurf
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Postby 24hr-mum » Tue Feb 01, 2011 7:44 am

then that toy is probably not the most precious one for him, if the dumping strategy dont work.

or dont allow him to take 2nd toy or do other fave things unless first toy has been kept?

or put the toys in simple containers easy to keep? like those from daiso? sometimes those original packaging maybe diff to keep back nicely

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Postby Chenonceau » Tue Feb 01, 2011 8:01 am

I did 2 things.

(1) I pretended to cry. Sob. Sob. Waaaaaaaah! And I hide my head in my pillow and say "I'm sad!". Then Little Boy would waddle up in Pampers and pat my knee and go put away all his toys.

(2) I put on a role play baby sister persona. I am the baby and he is the gor-gor. He hated being bossed around by adults and would say "no" to everything. But in my baby role play persona, I could boss him around like nobody's business... except that I had to go around squeaking like a baby. Very inelegant for me but he was so young I couldn't hit him.

(3) Even more powerful an effect could be had when I, in my baby sister persona looks hurt and wails loudly. He would run around looking quite panicked to find something to console me. It was so funny. He took the role play quite seriously.

You can create your own role play... something that appeals to your boy and gets him to imagine he is someone else and that putting toys back is part of that someone's role. Bob the Builder has to throw away bricks? Thomas the Train needs to deliver parcels to each person stationed at the different toy boxes.

Chenonceau
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Postby smurf » Tue Feb 01, 2011 9:22 am

The containers are very simple already leh...just Ikea boxes.
Yup, I have tried to disallow 2nd toy before first toy is kept. Itworks something. :D

Role play ha? I tried sometimes, sometime works sometimes dun. If use too often, the child will find it amusing leh... :lol:

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