toddler misbehaving only with mom!

Parental influence on children in the first 12 years of their lives have a permanent effect. Unfortunately, children come with no user manual. Each child is different from the other. Discuss how to handle emotional and educational needs of your child here.

toddler misbehaving only with mom!

Postby riash » Fri Dec 03, 2010 9:12 pm

Hi my DS1 is 2.5yrs old and he is a gem of a boy with everyone except me, his mom! when i am around he totally misbehaves, screams and shouts and even doesn't eat! i really don't know why he is like this and more importantly, its so upsetting for me. i was on leave today and he didn't eat his bfast and lunch. i have to physically be away from him and then he will eat or sleep. otherwise he looks for me, whines and wants me - but doesn't do a thing i suggest. sigh. what am i doing wrong - i spend a lot of time with him, more than i do with my DS2 who is one. DS1 will greet me by climbing onto the dining table when i come home. HELP!!

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Postby jedamum » Fri Dec 03, 2010 9:16 pm

who takes care of him when you are working?

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Postby riash » Fri Dec 03, 2010 10:00 pm

jedamum wrote:who takes care of him when you are working?


he goes to childcare half day and then is home with the maid

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Re: toddler misbehaving only with mom!

Postby pecalis » Fri Dec 03, 2010 10:03 pm

riash wrote:Hi my DS1 is 2.5yrs old and he is a gem of a boy with everyone except me, his mom! when i am around he totally misbehaves, screams and shouts and even doesn't eat! i really don't know why he is like this and more importantly, its so upsetting for me. i was on leave today and he didn't eat his bfast and lunch. i have to physically be away from him and then he will eat or sleep. otherwise he looks for me, whines and wants me - but doesn't do a thing i suggest. sigh. what am i doing wrong - i spend a lot of time with him, more than i do with my DS2 who is one. DS1 will greet me by climbing onto the dining table when i come home. HELP!!


Children know who loves them the most! My mil used to comment tt my kids when younger, will "bully" the mummy. However, for my case, I'm SAHM. Guess since you are working - your DS1 looks like he is trying to get your attention. My suggestion is tt you give him the attention when he is well-behaved. When he misbehave, pls do not give him the attention as it will reinforce his "bad" behaviour - he is just trying to get your attention. Easier said than done :P though.
All the best :celebrate:

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Postby aqeqiq » Fri Dec 03, 2010 10:27 pm

Agree with pecalis. It sounds like your son is seeking your attention in whatever shape or form. Maybe you need to spend more 1-1 time with him?
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Postby jedamum » Fri Dec 03, 2010 11:18 pm

besides spending time with him, get the caregiver to constantly put you in a good light and explain to the boy why you need to be away to work.
my boys whines for me too...i guess most kids do that to their mums, only depends on the degree....even as a sahm, my boys behave better when the dad is around and returns to their 'true' whiny/rowdy self.

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Postby smurf » Fri Dec 03, 2010 11:26 pm

Ds2 who is 2.5 also dun behave with me. For one instruction, I need to say it at least 5 times. And even when I said it 5 times, he still does not do it! Eg, wearing shirt, picking toys, eat, etc. Only when I threaten with cane, then he will promptly do it. But when I keep the cane, it is back to square one.

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Postby Muffins » Sat Dec 04, 2010 6:27 pm

hi riash, and you too smurf

i think, since your baby knows that you are more forgiving, since you are his mum, and since he is young, he does this to like "test his luck", or something like that....

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Postby riash » Sun Dec 05, 2010 10:51 pm

thanks everyone for your thoughts, i am really hoping its a phase and that he will grow out of it:) i am going to try to spend more 1 on 1 time with him as well.

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Postby DesertWind » Mon Dec 06, 2010 9:08 pm

Hi riash,

My boy too, was a gem of boy with other people except with his parents. He behaves pretty well with the maid and in the presence of his grandparents. But when both my husband and I are home from work, he will start screaming and yelling and yes - climbing onto the dinner table to disturb me when I eat!
:P
My maid said he is usually not like that during the day only once we came back and this is normal behaviour for most kids seeking parents' attention.

He behaves much better when he was alone with just one of us, either with me, my husband or maid. Once all of us are around - oh boy!
:celebrate:

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