Will kids who are not plugged into pop culture suffer?

Parental influence on children in the first 12 years of their lives have a permanent effect. Unfortunately, children come with no user manual. Each child is different from the other. Discuss how to handle emotional and educational needs of your child here.

Do you restrict your kids from pop culture

Yes, I think it is necessary to restrict them
3
18%
No, I think they should be given the exposure
6
35%
I have never thought about it
8
47%
 
Total votes : 17

Will kids who are not plugged into pop culture suffer?

Postby mummy always » Tue Jan 11, 2011 8:18 pm

I have a question. My P4 & P5 boys do not play much computer games nor watch much TV. They do not have a handphone either. They do not read books which are popular among children their age, like harry potter or on witches/vampires because we are christians and these books are not aligned to our values.

They are this way due to our strict controls (on TV and computer), and they dont seemed very deprived - they do not hanker after TV, or games or even the books I mentioned. (Although I was ever told by a teen that I was depriving the kids but of course my kids won't know better). My kids do play the Wii, watch nature programmes, programs on Okto, read a lot (mostly non-fiction as they are interested in Science; they do read fiction too). Anyway, their only source of pop culture is from their school friends, where they learn things like Mr Brown's songs.

I realised that many young children nowadays are very much into songs and mtv and games starting from very young age. So I wonder whether our chosen way of bringing up our children will cause them to suffer in the near future, or when they are in their teens - esp when they go into sec school. Will they be labelled as weird, or aliens or something?

I will much appreciate any views. Thanks v much.

mummy always
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Postby pecalis » Tue Jan 11, 2011 8:48 pm

My kids love to watch TV prog and play computer games but I limit their time on such. My dd1, when in P6, did tell me tt she felt out of place and not able to connect with her classmates as she had no idea about the songs they sing/listen to and the TV prog they watch. She went to U-tube to find out about songs by Taylor Swift so that she could connect with them and I told her I'm ok with that so long as she knows if the influence is neg, she has to be able to say no or stop indulging in such. Told her she need not force herself to like such songs if she doesn't. If it's neutral, it's also ok to like them.

My children learn to be contented with having just a few good friends. My dd is friendly with almost everyone in class but she couldn't find a cliche tt suits her. She is secure to go recess on her own. She found 1 or 2 friends whom she could connect with and they started going one another's house or JN8 after psle last yr.

pecalis
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Postby Brenda10 » Wed Jan 12, 2011 8:57 am

My dd likes to on the radio while doing the homework. She also watches the channel 533 for those English MTV songs quite frequencies. We also allow her to play computer game (30-45 minutes) few times in a week.

Brenda10
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Postby cnimed » Thu Jan 13, 2011 12:56 pm

We restrict, but we do not ban. Dh studies culture actually and I did study media, so we discuss with the children the roots of certain pop culture, and our opinions on things. It's better to understand than to have a blanket ban without knowing why.

Just wanted to add that having common topics to talk about is useful as a way to network, break ice, or just to mingle. It doesn't have to be about pop culture, though that would obviously be the easiest topic for tweens and teenagers. I think I would like my children to at least know what others are talking about, but instead of blindly following, to be able to form their own opinions about them. DH and I don't watch a lot of TV, but if we happen to watch some MTV award show, we are the kind who will google up singers or artistes that we don't know about but seem very popular, just out of curiousity about where they come from, how they came to fame etc.
cnimed
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Postby mummy always » Fri Jan 14, 2011 1:44 am

Thanks for all the replies. I do think about how I can expose them to more pop culture. However, the boys do not have much free time, and because we are so rarely on TV, we don't even "come across" MTV much.

I am sure not being able to connect will have its negative impact on them, but I am just not sure how serious it will be, and whether they would be able to withstand it. I would love to hear some teens' views and experience on such things...

I actually don't ban them from any specific things, but their exposure is so little....

My son does play computer games, but very little, mainly also because he does not have a lot of free time. Sounds sad, eh. I always wonder, how do kids find so much time to play games...

mummy always
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Postby shirley.tamzil » Mon Jan 17, 2011 1:14 pm

For my children, I expose them 'with filter' and 'added opinion' from me. I listen to radio while driving, so there are chances that pop music or conversations between DJ would pop up. DS1 will sometimes tell me that his fren is listening to songs by that singer or that song. I have always advise DS1 that some songs are not written 'responsibly', so he has to know what is right and wrong even when listening to songs. Whenever I hear opinions from DJs which I dun agree or hav opinions about, I would voice it out and discuss it with DS1.

For TV shows, I try to watch it together with my children if I feel that some 'education' are needed. There was once where the show was very sexual (I had already explained the 'birds n bees' to him), DS1 complains that the show is not good and boring bcos it's too sexual :oops: , and he subsequently lost interest in following it.

So I think it's ok to expose them as long as we give them proper guidance about the world.

shirley.tamzil
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Postby Chenonceau » Mon Jan 17, 2011 2:16 pm

shirley.tamzil wrote:For my children, I expose them 'with filter' and 'added opinion' from me. I listen to radio while driving, so there are chances that pop music or conversations between DJ would pop up. DS1 will sometimes tell me that his fren is listening to songs by that singer or that song. I have always advise DS1 that some songs are not written 'responsibly', so he has to know what is right and wrong even when listening to songs. Whenever I hear opinions from DJs which I dun agree or hav opinions about, I would voice it out and discuss it with DS1.

For TV shows, I try to watch it together with my children if I feel that some 'education' are needed. There was once where the show was very sexual (I had already explained the 'birds n bees' to him), DS1 complains that the show is not good and boring bcos it's too sexual :oops: , and he subsequently lost interest in following it.

So I think it's ok to expose them as long as we give them proper guidance about the world.


I do exactly this too.

Chenonceau
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Postby 3Boys » Tue Jan 18, 2011 2:47 pm

My 2 y.o. sings to Lady Gaga.....Ga Ga O la la, Roma roma.....

Come to think of it, her songs are a bit like kids nursery rhymes. :wink:

3Boys
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Postby Tinkerbelle » Tue Jan 18, 2011 3:15 pm

I restrict my DDs but do not ban them. I believe everything in moderation is healthy. My DDs watch TV, play computer games, read Harry Potter and Twillight books and love her music but she's not overly obsessed with them.

DD1 in P6 has mentioned to me that her classmates are all into pop music. However, there'e one particular classmate who is not allowed to play computer games, read books on vampires or listen to music. She didn't even know who Lady Gaga is. As a result, she could not relate to the other classmates and felt left out when they talk about the latest books or music. In the end, to fit in, she borrowed the Twillight book from her classmates and read them secretly in sch.

Tinkerbelle
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Postby Alex001 » Sun Jan 23, 2011 2:08 pm

Your kids play the Wii? That's a privilege.. depending on the type of games they have. I understand that disallowing your children from playing the computer and listening to today's music is acceptable, but not allowing them to read popular children's books? I understand that following Christianity is important, but books are educational and contain morales for children. Check out some family sites regarding what types of books children should read...it may be useful.

Alex001
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