Behaviour

Parental influence on children in the first 12 years of their lives have a permanent effect. Unfortunately, children come with no user manual. Each child is different from the other. Discuss how to handle emotional and educational needs of your child here.

Behaviour

Postby Yanti » Tue Jan 03, 2012 11:21 am

Hi, I am having some issues with my 7 year old son.

Eg:

He did not want to speak up for himself. Each time he made a mistake, it seems soooo hard for him to apologize or explain to us what happened and he will just give us a blank face.

We are extremely worried. We tried to talk to him but still the same. Anyone has a similar issues. Really need advice.

Thanks

Yanti
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Re: Behaviour

Postby cherrygal » Tue Jan 03, 2012 5:23 pm

I think it's a phase. My son does that too - give blank face etc. Think they still can't react fast enuff at this age when confronted. He can bargain and argue when he hasn't done anything wrong so I guess it's the direct confrontation that caused the clam up. It could be the kid's defence mechanism (like men... :evil: )

So when he does something wrong, I have to tell him to apologise and assure him that that's all we want (eg. you say "apologise now and you can go back to what you were doing"). He complies if he's thinking straight. hahaha

Then you can ask him to explain himself when he's in a calmer mood. Easier this way.

cherrygal
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Re: Behaviour

Postby Yanti » Wed Jan 04, 2012 7:35 am

@ Cherrygal..well I guess you are right.... am glad its nothing serious...will try a different approach next time... thanks

Yanti
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Re: Behaviour

Postby pair » Tue Apr 17, 2012 7:54 pm

Try to get more familiar with your son so that he can interact with you properly and can share his problems with you.

pair
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Re: Behaviour

Postby Bunbun » Tue Apr 17, 2012 8:44 pm

My girl was like that from k2 to p2. She couldn't bring herself to apologise.
She's in p3 now. Gotten over the phase already. Even readily says sorry when she accidentally brushes against someone.

Bunbun
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Re: Behaviour

Postby heyhoe » Thu Apr 19, 2012 10:17 am

Mine in P4, still hasn't. Everytime, I've to teach him to apologise.

Just this morning,.....
Ds2: Mommy, Ds1 hide my fresh milk behind the milk powder can.
Ds1: No, I didn't!
Ds2: Yes, he did!
Me: Seething. So, who's lying? (*Thinking mode)
Ds1 & Ds2: Not me....it's him!
Me: Ds1, did you put the milk can in front of the fresh milk?
Ds1: Smirking, .... yes, I place the milk can infront of the fresh milk and not the other way around.
Me: (Seething inside) Don't try to be a smart aleck! Now, go and apologise to your brother!
Ds1: Saying "sorry" but with no sincerity.

How to get him to understand what he did is wrong and apologise sincerely?

heyhoe
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Re: Behaviour

Postby chenwj » Thu Apr 26, 2012 12:41 pm

My boy used to be like that as well. :sweat: You just have to explain to him patiently what he did is wrong. At that age (5-6 years old), I think they are still clueless. I tried to talk to him nicely "Hey, that's not the right way! blah blah".

I believe you did not give him a very fierce tone or a fierce look when you questioned him. Children only react when they sensed their parents are angry, hence we think it's normal when he react when are raise our temper. :skeptical:

chenwj
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Re: Behaviour

Postby johnmansfield » Thu May 10, 2012 2:13 pm

hi.you try to more familiar with you child.Ask and share all the feelings about your child and behave like friends with child. That makes his mind cool.

johnmansfield
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Re: Behaviour

Postby Happy1314 » Fri May 18, 2012 4:51 pm

Can anyone advice how can I help my 9yrs old son to manage his emotion and anger?? He often had snap-shots in school with his classmates as well as some of his Teachers....I realised that he does not have any close friends in his present class....

Happy1314
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