Throwing temper in Childcare

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Throwing temper in Childcare

Postby minlon » Fri Oct 05, 2012 1:36 pm

My boy is in fulltime childcare of K2 from NTUC..
To my frustrating, the teacher ( fr China) call me several time about my boy misbehave and refuce to listen.
She keep telling me that she has no control of my boy and running out of idea as she has to take care of 30 children, bah! bah!bah...
Whenever, she complain, I use to cane my boy and give him time out and even punish him for not giving him dinner. But, it won't help..the teacher still call me. I'm also run out of idea..
I'm working 5 days a week and I look after him on weekend and dun see him not listening and mischief even in playground.
I'm wondering the teacher is well train or tactful enough to handled disobedient child???
Hopefully I could seek advice from here!
I may not abled to access the forum often..your valuable advice is appreaciated.

minlon
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Re: Throwing temper in Childcare

Postby verykiasumummy » Fri Oct 05, 2012 2:20 pm

ur boy may not misbehave in front of u cos u r his mum... but in sch where there are so many other children, u cant guarantee..

forget about work... spend quality time understanding ur ds and know what he is thinking... u need to find out the problem yourself.. the sch teacher cannot give u a solution as good as u of cos... u cant depend totally on them...

teachers are of cos trained to teach kids, be it good or naughty.. but they couldnt be just teaching your ds only, there are still 30 over for them to look after... to ask the teacher to solve the problem is not fair to the other kids...

verykiasumummy
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Re: Throwing temper in Childcare

Postby Gifts from Heaven » Fri Oct 05, 2012 6:47 pm

Hi minlon,

You are v vague in your description of the misbehaviour of your child in school as well as what the teacher said to you about the misbehaviour. What kind of misbehaviour was reported? Did the teacher tell you what was your child doing before his mischief and what did the teacher do after the mischief (ie the consequences)? How often is it happening?
You need to provide more info for the mummies/daddies here to give you ideas.
If the issue is indeed due to the lack of training/experience or attitude of the teacher, you would be able to tell from answers to the above questions. Then probably, you could feedback higher up to ask for help (not complain). At home, you will need to teach/remind your kid how to behave the correct way in school since he probably don't know/forget the right way to behave. Personally, I don't think caning or refusing your kid his dinner helps since he probably has already got his "punishment" in school.
Sad to say, you will need to work with the school to resolve the misbehaviour problem. Not possible to pass on the problem to the teacher totally 'cos you are the parent of your child.
Hope this helps.

Gifts from Heaven
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Re: Throwing temper in Childcare

Postby Imami » Fri Oct 05, 2012 7:34 pm

No matter what the nature of misbehavior is, no amount of caning, time out or even not having dinner of help IF you don't explain to your little one what is wrong. I had gone thru the same scenario. Children this young may not be able to connect an earlier behavior to a subsequent punishment. Unfortunately, it is not always possible to match a punishment with the "crime" on a real time basis.

What I did back then was to get the teachers to give me specific examples of the misbehaviors. I did not agree with the teachers all the time. At times, I felt that it was a miscommunication between the teacher and my child. I try to "re-enact" the scenarios to my child and asked him what went wrong. Most of the time, he knew what went wrong and how he should have done.

Not all the time the child is at fault. As a teacher/adult, one shd know better. It is unprofessional to say "I have 30 kids to attend..." and then just shove the problem back to the parents. However, as working parents, we have little control over such situations (unless you change the cc lor). But we can help our children to learn about self control and the appropriate code of behavior. And we have vested interest in helping our kid's, because we are the parents.

Imami
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Re: Throwing temper in Childcare

Postby slmkhoo » Fri Oct 05, 2012 7:45 pm

Imami wrote:What I did back then was to get the teachers to give me specific examples of the misbehaviors. I did not agree with the teachers all the time. At times, I felt that it was a miscommunication between the teacher and my child. I try to "re-enact" the scenarios to my child and asked him what went wrong. Most of the time, he knew what went wrong and how he should have done.

I agree with this. Also, do you handle the situations the same way as the teachers? There may be some confusion on the part of your son if the expected behaviour or the methods of discipline are different. You may have to explain explicitly to your son what the rules in the cc are and how they differ from home.

Is your child an only child? Children who are used to being given their way a lot by adults at home sometimes find it hard to adjust in cc when they are just one of many kids. That again is something you may need to explain to your child. Just some thoughts.

slmkhoo
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Re: Throwing temper in Childcare

Postby heyhoe » Sun Oct 07, 2012 7:16 am

Hi minlon,

It must be tough as a FTWM to hear complains from the teacher most of the time, especially so when it comes from the same teacher.

I agreed with most moms here that you need to find out the exact source of misbehaviour and work with the teacher. Here is an example of misbehaviour that happen to my child. Eg. I had complained from the childcare that my ds draws on table.

I had a talk with my ds on the reason that he did so. He complained that he was bored and not allow to talk to his friends thus he draw on the table, as the teacher has taken away his workbook.

Thus, I spoke to the teacher to work with me. I allow him to bring a note book. He is allowed to draw on the book whenever he is bored. Thereafter, no more such incident.

However, kids being kids will come out with other mischiefs. We just have to be patient, tackle it one at the time and work with the teacher. Perhaps, it is also good to build a good relationship with the teacher and teach her how to handle your child.

Hope this helps.

heyhoe
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Re: Throwing temper in Childcare

Postby Oppsgal » Sun Oct 07, 2012 10:19 am

Get the teacher to explain immediately to kid why the behavior not accepted. Ask the teacher to get kid stand immediately in a "naughty corner" after her explanation?

Oppsgal
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Re: Throwing temper in Childcare

Postby hercules » Wed Oct 31, 2012 4:52 pm

Only Chinese teacher complained and not other teachers?

He only starts his misbehaviour at K2 and didnt misbehave in K1 and earlier?

hercules
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