How to cultivate a positive learning attitude in our kids

Parental influence on children in the first 12 years of their lives have a permanent effect. Unfortunately, children come with no user manual. Each child is different from the other. Discuss how to handle emotional and educational needs of your child here.

How to cultivate a positive learning attitude in our kids

Postby mintcc » Thu Sep 03, 2009 10:27 am

Original Title: Cultivating a positive learning attitude in our kids

Great idea from another thread:
http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/forum ... 5416#55416

Let's share ways to cultivate a positive learning attitude...

mintcc
BlackBelt
BlackBelt
 
Posts: 880
Joined: Tue Sep 11, 2007 2:05 pm
Total Likes: 0


Postby mintcc » Thu Sep 03, 2009 10:44 am

I am a firm believal that passion and interest is important in order for us to do something well. That includes learning.

My boy is turning 4 soon and I am starting to worry over his learning attitude. He seems to be bright and enjoy learning and will pester me to read story books every night. His childcare teachers comment that he love learning and is hence easy to teach.

However, I started to notice some negative attitude he had towards learning during his Shichida classes and his willingness to learn is basically only on subjects that interest him and what he do well in.

For task that are more difficult to him, or he did badly in previously, he will refuse to try and become uncooperative. I am pulling him out for now but I think I still need to address this.

I have read that praising effort towards completing a task should be the way to go and have always done that (though every body else including hb, in-laws like to use praises such as clever, smart etc)

Wondering whether there are any other ideas on how to cultivate a positive learning attitude?

mintcc
BlackBelt
BlackBelt
 
Posts: 880
Joined: Tue Sep 11, 2007 2:05 pm
Total Likes: 0


Postby Wesim » Thu Sep 03, 2009 11:15 am

My girl also has slight negative attitude when it comes to Chinese. Why i said 'slight' is because she will push away the activity books (very simple books, which is only 2 or 3 pages) when i try to do revision with her. However, she will listen attentively when i read Chinese books to her.

Hmm....wonder why...

Wesim
OrangeBelt
OrangeBelt
 
Posts: 84
Joined: Fri Apr 03, 2009 3:56 pm
Total Likes: 0


Postby tony » Thu Sep 03, 2009 12:08 pm

Yesterday, there was open rebellion at home. My #1 refused to do his tuition centre and school homework, screaming blue murder. To be fair, he never had this homework before he enrolled, but it isn't a lot either. Luckily the idea of this thread was sounding the alarm in my head and I really suppressed the lava that was leaking out. I only threatened 1x :lol: (not buying this toy he's been eyeing for months), and when he finally did his work, I praised his effort lavishly with a very little reminder that the initial attitude wasn't what it was supposed to be. I don't think he learnt his lesson just like that. But hopefully if we keep up this type of positive exchange, we can all have a more conducive environment towards doing homework.

Anyway, I gave my kids a reward after that by flying planes in the evening, and just now too (in the hot sun, sweat).
Last edited by tony on Thu Sep 03, 2009 12:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.

tony
OrangeBelt
OrangeBelt
 
Posts: 85
Joined: Mon Feb 02, 2009 1:38 pm
Total Likes: 0


Postby tony » Thu Sep 03, 2009 12:39 pm

Mincy, I just read your post. This is what I did when the boys were younger. I just followed (actually, still following) their interests. The reason is that if I asked them to do what I'd like them to do (of course it'd be more academic driven, and maybe while they're doing their worksheets quietly, I can kaio kar and sip tea. Okay, in my dreams :D ), there'd be fights to no end. To me, it's not worth the hassle of working so hard to "educate" them if they're not keen. At a young age, there is so much learning from all around anyway, not just from books or worksheets. Anyway, some kids are more strong willed than others, so I just accept it lor.

Now that school is in the picture, I can't quite follow that agenda. Some people say that sitting down to do worksheets ad nauseum when they're young is good training for when they're in school. But that idea really turns me off, and I really doubt if my kids are trainable that way. All I can say is that they're happy, do reasonably well without much coaching from me (except for tedious things like English and Chinese homework - both hate writing with a passion). And they're widely read in their chosen topics of interest.

I'm thinking, if I were a girl/employer 15-20 years out into the future, I sure hope to find my boys interesting and knowledgeable guys to marry/hire! :wink:

tony
OrangeBelt
OrangeBelt
 
Posts: 85
Joined: Mon Feb 02, 2009 1:38 pm
Total Likes: 0



Postby BlueBells » Thu Sep 03, 2009 12:56 pm

Sometimes, when kids refused to do homework, it may be because they are tired. So I usually get them to take five, pop a sweet, and then they are happily back at their work.

BlueBells
BrownBelt
BrownBelt
 
Posts: 533
Joined: Tue Aug 05, 2008 5:00 pm
Total Likes: 18


Postby Busymom » Thu Sep 03, 2009 2:01 pm

mincy wrote:For task that are more difficult to him, or he did badly in previously, he will refuse to try and become uncooperative. I am pulling him out for now but I think I still need to address this.



I think most kids like (and therefore are motivated) to do things that they can excel in or are easy to do. Maybe there are some who are the determined type and would persevere when the going gets tough. Unfortunately, my DD is not like that. When she comes to things that she can't do or solve, she will lose interest and want to do something else. For me, I try to be as encouraging as possible and if it is really beyond her ability in my opinion, I will help her along the way, e.g. give her some hints if she gets stuck in puzzles or blocks,etc. I will also try to motivate her using different things. It could be stickers (this used to work wonders but it is getting less effective now.), desserts (she's a real glutton), or just simply the things that she wants (I'll make sure that the things that she asks for commensurate with the effort that is put in. So far so good, she has always just asked for simple things. Maybe still simple-minded :wink: ).

It is still work-in-progress for me with DD. Different scenarios would call for different approach at the end of the day. Importantly, you have to keep telling your son that it doesn't matter if he didn't get the answer right, or that his friends could do certain things better than him. As long as he has tried, you would be happy.

Sometimes, DD would look at me and asks "wrong, never mind?"

My answer is always "Yes, that's alright. Just try."

Of course, easier said than done.

Busymom
Councillor
Councillor
 
Posts: 7294
Joined: Mon Jul 06, 2009 6:56 pm
Total Likes: 26


Postby daisyt » Thu Sep 03, 2009 2:57 pm

Hi mincy, thanks for starting the thread. :D

I feel that positive, active and motivation are always together. Active learning came to me when my girl was P5. The form teacher enlighted me with this term during the meet parents session. After hearing the teacher's advice, I try to get my girl to seek for the answers and the methods herself, through google or books. I also used a lot questioning to get her discover the answers "What do you think?" "Why is it like this?" "Who not the other way?". Another teacher was telling me, even after getting the YES answer, don't just stop there. Ask yourself, why is it YES. To me, the process of try and error is more important than getting the correct answer. Some might think its wasting time but I rather waste some time to make her understand more.

She was quite a timid child when small. I would push her to try new things by persuade, encourage and praise. Once she made a step forward, I would praise her, regarless whats the outcome and result. Now she is 13, I always tell her, to be fair to yourself and everyone, try it before saying you don't like it.


Now in Sec school, she has a lot of project work and need to work with different types of peoples. Human relationship is the next thing she is learning. We would analysise different characters of her friends, good and bad qualities, how to understand them better from their normal daily behaviour. She would also observe how different teachers handle the class and we start discussing. She would look up those seniors with good qualities to motivate herself. She has a few seniors in school who she set them as her role models. I always tell her, if so and so can do it, why can't you. So far, she quite buy this concept.

In her 3rd language class, seeing everyone dropping the lesson, one follow by the other, it can be very depressing. I told her, no matter how hard things can turn out to be, HANG ON ! Hang on to the pole even you left with two fingers holding it, keep hanging on ... good result and outcome would follow naturally. So far she is still hanging there .... I hope she won't let go the last two fingers. :D

daisyt
KiasuGrandMaster
KiasuGrandMaster
 
Posts: 2430
Joined: Tue Aug 26, 2008 11:54 am
Total Likes: 0


Postby corrochan » Fri Sep 04, 2009 12:25 am

Wesim wrote:My girl also has slight negative attitude when it comes to Chinese. Why i said 'slight' is because she will push away the activity books (very simple books, which is only 2 or 3 pages) when i try to do revision with her. However, she will listen attentively when i read Chinese books to her.


hi Wesim, just wondering if there can be alternative mtd to teaching her Chinese? I will caution against "labelling" her with "negative attitude" cos I'm sure you do believe she does have the right attitude. Right? Right? .... :)

So it must be the mtd lah....blame the mtd better than blaming your girl mah.

One way I tried is to demonstrate the logic and creativity and evolution of the Chinese chars i.e. how they come about from symbolic drawings. My kid found that interesting.

Keep on trying diff things and don't give up! :celebrate:

corrochan
YellowBelt
YellowBelt
 
Posts: 28
Joined: Tue Feb 10, 2009 5:11 pm
Total Likes: 0


Postby kaydenbrown » Fri Sep 04, 2009 9:50 am

Why Have a Positive Attitude?

- You expect success and positive results.

- You are better able to handle problems.

- People want to be around you.

- You find life more interesting.

- You will find people to be more interesting.

- Your health is better.

- You recover from setbacks faster.

- You view failures as learning experience.

- You feel better about yourself.

- You get more done.

kaydenbrown
GreenBelt
GreenBelt
 
Posts: 132
Joined: Thu Aug 13, 2009 1:22 pm
Total Likes: 0


Next

Return to Working With Your Child