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Anybody kids cry in school? Please share here,worried mum

Parental influence on children in the first 12 years of their lives have a permanent effect. Unfortunately, children come with no user manual. Each child is different from the other. Discuss how to handle emotional and educational needs of your child here.

Re: Anybody kids cry in school? Please share here,worried mu

Postby verysadparent » Tue Jun 20, 2017 2:22 pm

jessielu wrote:My gal got this habit ever since she into preschool, even till now at p4, she will avoid school in morning when dropping her, school counselor oso dunno wats wrong. But as parents, we have to be firm and keep emphasizing school is impt n fun to be in. Every day, I have to be vigilant in observing her behavior, if she shows symptoms of reluctant to go school, will talk to her n encourage her to attend school.

She even envy her sec 1 bro who had started his holidays. Complaining n complaining, I have to make her see tat sec life n pri life is vast apart. Hopefully she be able to accept it well n grow out of this crying habits.


Hi jessielu, how is your gal now? My gal is almost like that. Very often will cry when going to school. School counsellor can't help much and the school is getting very pissed off

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Re: Anybody kids cry in school? Please share here,worried mu

Postby FishFingers » Tue Jun 20, 2017 2:31 pm

My DD2 cried when I left her at the new school with DD1 last Sunday.

After some assurances,I asked DD1 to bring her into the school.
Last edited by FishFingers on Tue Jun 20, 2017 4:25 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Anybody kids cry in school? Please share here,worried mu

Postby ammonite » Tue Jun 20, 2017 3:50 pm

verysadparent wrote:Hi jessielu, how is your gal now? My gal is almost like that. Very often will cry when going to school. School counsellor can't help much and the school is getting very pissed off


How old is she? Is there a pattern to her crying and how is she coming home from school?

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Re: Anybody kids cry in school? Please share here,worried mu

Postby Liselle » Fri Jul 21, 2017 1:26 pm

Hi, my children (6 and 3y) cry sometimes when certain events trigger them off. My son is when he has spelling or tingxie, he gives himself too much pressure and he cries saying he can't remember. We have always been telling him its ok not to remember, as long as you try your best.
My son is timid in nature and we are trying to give him much more encouragement to boost his confidence. He even cry when his teacher is on mc and another teacher took over

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Re: Anybody kids cry in school? Please share here,worried mu

Postby phtthp » Fri Jul 21, 2017 2:26 pm

Perhaps u may want to bring him to KK hospital child guidance clinic, to see a child psychologist : find out the root cause, why your child cry easily. You may go via Polyclinic, ask them for a referral letter, to refer your child to KK hospital : how to help an anxious child calm down. Cheaper, this way.

It is not normal, that if a subject school Tr go on leave or on MC, another replacement Tr come in to teach the class : your child cry

Helpful phrases, to help an anxious child struggling with anxiety, to calm down
http://lemonlimeadventures.com/what-to- ... ous-child/

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Re: Anybody kids cry in school? Please share here,worried mu

Postby zac's mum » Fri Jul 21, 2017 7:17 pm

I'm sorry, I don't have much experience in this. My boy isn't particularly sensitive or emotionally attached to a particular teacher. Most of the crying happens when he's in pain or something disrupts his routine. But I came across this article on my FB feed today, maybe it may help your situation? http://pickanytwo.net/the-train-analogy ... ing-child/

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Re: Anybody kids cry in school? Please share here,worried mu

Postby zac's mum » Fri Jul 21, 2017 7:24 pm


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Re: Anybody kids cry in school? Please share here,worried mu

Postby Liselle » Mon Jul 24, 2017 10:14 am

i have googled after spoken to several of his teachers, i came to realise that he can be considered as a highly sensitive child. Highly sensitive children do not like changes, do not like to try new things. he was even unhappy and refused to do coloring when his grandpa commented that his coloring is ugly.

These children take things personally and is a perfectionist. He gets very upset and cries when he realised he don't remember his spelling words, or when a friend asked if he is a naughty boy. I did contemplate if i should bring him to a psychologist, but when i googled, it's not a psychological problem, it's just the way they are tuned.

http://singaporeschild.com.sg/how-to-ra ... ive-child/

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Re: Anybody kids cry in school? Please share here,worried mu

Postby jedamum » Thu Jul 27, 2017 3:01 am

Liselle,
I have two highly sensitive boys.
One a teenager and one a preteen.
Managing them and teaching them how to manage needs to first start with reading up and examining our own parenting style and how we react to them.

For instance, instead of feeling they do not like changes, accept it and teach them to set up systems to cope in times on unfamiliarity. A lot of talking, listening (I'm guilty of not listening enough, but the dad fill in this gap), sharing of views. Result is a closer relationship with the kids.

Ds1 was very opinionated with what he didn't want when he was younger. Didn't like this or that. He feared attending school for a moment back then when he saw his peers got punished for in class. Beginning of the academic year was always stressful due to changes in routine and teachers. I had even contemplated home schooling him with all the stress going on to get him to like school during his preschool phase. Now a teenager, he is still not fish to water regarding changes in the new year but he learned to focus on other stuff that he likes. His sensitivity had translated to sensibility as he stepped into this period as he can feel from others perspective. The perfectionist portion needs to be dealt with as it is indeed a pressure cooker in sec sch and we are seeing positive steps.

Ds2 is another sensitive dude. But with experience from ds1, we are continuing taking steps to get him to be more open to changes and disappointment. This boy is very resilient. But his first reaction is still there; in the face of failure/negative situation, his reaction and emotions are outright and excessive. But he bounces back pretty fast once he can rationalised the incident (either by self or I helped talk him through). It is still an ongoing process to teach him how to manage his emotions and I hope to do so before he hit teen phase. With this, his strength lies in being emphatatic towards others but may become his weakness that others may exploit.

The kids take after me and their dad, so I can relate to what they are going through. I think both of us are highly sensitive individuals, even now. But our management style are different and there had been conflicting ways we want to guide our children regarding how to manage. Truth is, in different sorts of situations, different style works for different kids. We are still trial and erroring aka learning on the job.

It gets easier to get them to communicate clearer when the kids gets older, but do not shy away from taking steps to manage it. Don't just feel that "they are wired this way" and just let it manifest. The society will not accommodate them when they get older so we need to guide them to manage before they decide that it is too overwhelming to manage their emotions that they start to shut people out.

Just my long winded opinion lah.

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Re: Anybody kids cry in school? Please share here,worried mu

Postby jedamum » Thu Jul 27, 2017 3:24 am


Liselle,
Thanks for this link.
I read it after I wrote my post and it sounded all too familiar.

Especially
"Children who are too sensitive may not be able to tolerate unintentional teasing, as they may not be able to identify between the real teasing and playful teasing."

Children who reacted sensitively to teasing, end up get teased even more. This is especially difficult for boys, who are expected to be more "man". A kind Teacher had told me that I need to toughen him up else he can't survive NS. So I need to strike a balance between acknowledging his nature and not growing him into strawberry at the same time.

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