Sibling Rivalry

Parental influence on children in the first 12 years of their lives have a permanent effect. Unfortunately, children come with no user manual. Each child is different from the other. Discuss how to handle emotional and educational needs of your child here.

Sibling Rivalry

Postby smurf » Wed Jan 06, 2010 10:31 pm

Quite sure that there is a topic about sibling rivalry, but I just can't find it. :?

Do your children fight? and what do you do when they are fighting? Do you continue letting them fight and 'solve' their 'problem' or do you intervene? :?

smurf
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Postby kiasimom » Wed Jan 06, 2010 10:33 pm

My two children, DS and DD bicker all the time!!!
I usually leave them to settle their own issues but if things get too out of hand, then I will intervene ;-)

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Postby mathsparks » Wed Jan 06, 2010 10:39 pm

Does age gap play a part? Mine - 5 years gap. No worries about fights. Heng ah! In fact, they love each other to bits.

Now that didi is away in school camp since yesterday, jie told me that the whole house is so quiet..and she realised this is how it would've been if she didn't have a bro. So touching, hor?

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Postby smurf » Wed Jan 06, 2010 10:40 pm

do they fight? as in not just argue, but beating?

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Postby kiasimom » Wed Jan 06, 2010 10:42 pm

mathsparks wrote:Does age gap play a part? Mine - 5 years gap. No worries about fights. Heng ah! In fact, they love each other to bits.

Now that didi is away in school camp since yesterday, jie told me that the whole house is so quiet..and she realised this is how it would've been if she didn't have a bro. So touching, hor?


Haha, mine is two years apart!
Children are interesting. They fight when they see each other but meimei miss gorgor when he was away for his 3 days scout camp last year :love:

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Postby mathsparks » Wed Jan 06, 2010 10:45 pm

kiasimom, they fight or just argue? tell smarty cannot fight hor. not gentleman.

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Postby smurf » Wed Jan 06, 2010 10:49 pm

for me, they fight a LOT. didi touches gor gor, kena beat, gor gor snatches toy from didi, also kena beat. beating including pulling hair, slapping, kicking.

Very often, I dunno how to intervene, cos didi is only 21 mth, dun understand a lot of things, tell him already, he still do it. :x

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Postby kiasimom » Wed Jan 06, 2010 10:49 pm

mathsparks wrote:kiasimom, they fight or just argue? tell smarty cannot fight hor. not gentleman.


They quarrel only.
I tell my children cannot resort to violence or else mummy will :nunchuk:

My two children's mouth are powerful weapons :faint:

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Postby Emelyn » Thu Jan 07, 2010 8:28 am

kiasimom wrote:
mathsparks wrote:kiasimom, they fight or just argue? tell smarty cannot fight hor. not gentleman.


They quarrel only.
I tell my children cannot resort to violence or else mummy will :nunchuk:

My two children's mouth are powerful weapons :faint:


My 2 boys are 2.5yrs apart (10+yo and 8+yo now). They bicker ALL the time. Plus DS2 is very mischievous, always disturb the elder brother.... sigh. And he can get physical too...like beat gor gor's backside and then run away. DS1 will get very upset...but I told him he cannot beat back. DS1 will usually shout back at the didi.

So, they will shout and scream at each other....which I dislike... Very noisy lei.

Anyone got solution?

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Postby EN » Thu Jan 07, 2010 6:16 pm

An extraction from my blog on my kids. I've change the name to dd and ds.

I have two very cute children dd and ds. Dd is 23 months 23 days older than her little brother ds. When they are both in good mood, life is all well. You can hear them chattering non-stop, exchanging stories, jokes, news at school, anything under the earth. But when they start bickering, the earth shakes. You see, they are polars apart. One is neat the other is untidy, one is precise, the other is clumsy, one needs to slog in order to get better grades, the other without much effort gotten a near prefect score, one totally lacking of energy but the other bursting with it. Yet, they love each other so deeply. It can be seen on how they protect or think of each other when away.

Examples: I fetch ds from school first then dd (different school).Unknown to me, he bought crackers for his sister. Fetched dd and they chatted happily while I drove them home. When I'm backed from work, I noticed a bitter quarelled has brewed. Why? Simply because, dd has forgotten to say thank you to ds for buying the cracker for her.

The kids were asleep one night when I pop into ds room to give a quick peck on his cheek. A book caught my eyes. "Superman- the junior novel". Hmmm...strange. I don't remember buying that book. Flipped through the pages, it has no name nor any library reference. I decided to ask them the following day since they were asleep then.

I was touched when I have gotten the answer from dd. After much probing, dd told me that she bought the book for ds in school. It was only $2 in hope to raise funds to help the Philippines victims of the recent disaster. I remember giving her $2 on the said date. "No balance money for you to eat then, dd?" I asked. She does has $1 balance the previous day. Just less money for her piggy bank that day.

But when they are quarelling, I rather not be there. Huge firework. One nags too much & the other will try to irritate further. Make a guess who nags and who irritates.

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