How to make your child more sociable in school

Parental influence on children in the first 12 years of their lives have a permanent effect. Unfortunately, children come with no user manual. Each child is different from the other. Discuss how to handle emotional and educational needs of your child here.

How to make your child more sociable in school

Postby fontaine1818 » Fri Feb 27, 2015 9:51 pm

My son is 10 and he does not seem to have any friends in school. During recess, after eating his food, he spends the remainder of his recess time in the library. If the library is closed, he spends his time walking around the school by himself. I have tried asking him whether any one is bullying or teasing him but he denies it. I have tried speaking to his teachers but they will just say that he is fine and they will monitor his behaviour closely in school henceforth etc. He is quite friendly with his enrichment classes friends and gets along well at home with his siblings. Anyone facing a similar problem?

fontaine1818
KiasuNewbie
KiasuNewbie
 
Posts: 9
Joined: Fri May 11, 2012 4:50 pm
Total Likes: 0


Re: How to make your child more sociable in school

Postby cse1217 » Thu Mar 12, 2015 10:52 pm

Maybe you can ask him why did he not spend time mingling with other students in his school/class?

Maybe there are already very cliquish groups in his class such that he feels out of place and finds it hard to join.

Can suggest asking his teacher to talk to someone in his class/someone who is more senior and more sociable to befriend your son during recess timing.

Was it a recent thing that happen from this year? Did anything else change in his behavior when he is in other places?

fontaine1818 wrote:My son is 10 and he does not seem to have any friends in school. During recess, after eating his food, he spends the remainder of his recess time in the library. If the library is closed, he spends his time walking around the school by himself. I have tried asking him whether any one is bullying or teasing him but he denies it. I have tried speaking to his teachers but they will just say that he is fine and they will monitor his behaviour closely in school henceforth etc. He is quite friendly with his enrichment classes friends and gets along well at home with his siblings. Anyone facing a similar problem?

cse1217
GreenBelt
GreenBelt
 
Posts: 110
Joined: Sat May 17, 2014 12:05 am
Total Likes: 0


Re: How to make your child more sociable in school

Postby slmkhoo » Fri Mar 13, 2015 7:47 am

Has he been like this since P1? Is he generally happy? How does he cope with enforced group activities in class, CCA etc? If he is OK when he needs to be in groups, he may just like his own company. Noisy classrooms and group work in class can be draining to an introvert, and he may need "alone" time during recess to recharge. If he seems unhappy, then it would be a cause for concern.

slmkhoo
KiasuGrandMaster
KiasuGrandMaster
 
Posts: 8071
Joined: Wed Sep 15, 2010 2:16 pm
Total Likes: 173


Re: How to make your child more sociable in school

Postby zbear » Fri Mar 13, 2015 9:09 am

My dd is an introvert n she enjoys being alone. She has been like that since Primary School days. Although she has friends, she doesn't like to socialise n prefers her own personal space.

So, you don't need to worry too much abt this.

zbear
KiasuGrandMaster
KiasuGrandMaster
 
Posts: 4988
Joined: Mon Sep 16, 2013 1:14 pm
Total Likes: 64


Re: How to make your child more sociable in school

Postby verykiasu » Fri Mar 13, 2015 2:08 pm

I have this issue too my boy moved to a new class this class & since then I can sense he has no friends, every lunch hour will call me, any remedy on how to help him open up

verykiasu
GreenBelt
GreenBelt
 
Posts: 189
Joined: Tue Jul 28, 2009 2:36 pm
Total Likes: 0



Re: How to make your child more sociable in school

Postby slmkhoo » Fri Mar 13, 2015 2:41 pm

verykiasu wrote:I have this issue too my boy moved to a new class this class & since then I can sense he has no friends, every lunch hour will call me, any remedy on how to help him open up

How old is he? Perhaps you can teach him some 'conversation starters' like asking about something that a classmate is reading or doing, or something that the other student has with him? If there is some "craze" going on right now, perhaps he can get into it, bring some of it to school, and that can be the start of a conversation? What about getting him to join some CCA? Or ask the form teacher to help (unobtrusively) by getting him included in some group activities, or giving him some role in class which would require him to talk to others? If he wants to make friends, tell him to stay near the others, look pleasant and smile, and be willing to make the first move.

(My kids have changed school several times, so this is from experience!)

slmkhoo
KiasuGrandMaster
KiasuGrandMaster
 
Posts: 8071
Joined: Wed Sep 15, 2010 2:16 pm
Total Likes: 173


Re: How to make your child more sociable in school

Postby verykiasu » Fri Mar 13, 2015 2:48 pm

Hi Slmkhoo
good ideas from you, I had jus written to the form teacher before I post, when she replied I will ask her if can give him some role so that he will be forced to interact... I have told him million times to start small conversation like can I join in to play, can I this and that..but I guess he simply didn't dare to do that as I think he's not used to tooo
he's big boy already P3

verykiasu
GreenBelt
GreenBelt
 
Posts: 189
Joined: Tue Jul 28, 2009 2:36 pm
Total Likes: 0


Re: How to make your child more sociable in school

Postby slmkhoo » Fri Mar 13, 2015 2:54 pm

verykiasu wrote:Hi Slmkhoo
good ideas from you, I had jus written to the form teacher before I post, when she replied I will ask her if can give him some role so that he will be forced to interact... I have told him million times to start small conversation like can I join in to play, can I this and that..but I guess he simply didn't dare to do that as I think he's not used to tooo
he's big boy already P3

Get him to practise by doing role play at home?

slmkhoo
KiasuGrandMaster
KiasuGrandMaster
 
Posts: 8071
Joined: Wed Sep 15, 2010 2:16 pm
Total Likes: 173


Re: How to make your child more sociable in school

Postby verykiasu » Fri Mar 13, 2015 3:00 pm

he will thot we are playing with him, he may not even want entertain us :O but I know he loves to be monitor, or teacher helper those

verykiasu
GreenBelt
GreenBelt
 
Posts: 189
Joined: Tue Jul 28, 2009 2:36 pm
Total Likes: 0


Re: How to make your child more sociable in school

Postby pokoyoko » Fri Mar 13, 2015 4:53 pm

Do your children have handphones? I know mine is less vocal but can text friends...of course I prefer real life interaction cos I wasn't much of a talker when I was young too...gets harder to interact as he grows older... :(

pokoyoko
GreenBelt
GreenBelt
 
Posts: 118
Joined: Tue Oct 21, 2014 10:03 am
Total Likes: 3


Next

Return to Working With Your Child