Why? Why? Why?

Parental influence on children in the first 12 years of their lives have a permanent effect. Unfortunately, children come with no user manual. Each child is different from the other. Discuss how to handle emotional and educational needs of your child here.

Why? Why? Why?

Postby ChiefKiasu » Sat Sep 13, 2008 12:57 am

Yes... how do we handle the serial inquisitive stage that all kids go through? Here's an example of how I handled my 3yo son's "What?" questions when I was in the car some years back.

Me: "OK... wait... daddy turn on the CD for you."
Him: "CD? What's CD?"
Me: "CD is where I store my music files lor."
Him: "Music files? What's Music files?"
Me: "Music files are music documents lor."
Him: "Documents? What's documents?"
Me: "Documents are books where I keep my music in some format."
Him: "Format? What's format?"
Me: "Format is a way we write, like mp3 lah."
Him: "MP3? What's MP3?"
Me :roll: : "MP3? It's a lossy compression method for converting analog audio into digital by sampling the source at high data rates while dropping frequencies that exceed the threshold which are unlikely to be noticeable by normal human hearing capabilities."
Him: Silence.
Me: "Understand?"
Him: "Yuh."

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Postby EN » Sun Sep 14, 2008 1:35 pm

I remember my son inquisitive stage strikes when he was 2.5 years old. It is not just a series of why but accompanied by what if & deduction. I thought he was being cheeky with his non-stop questions. My daughter who is 2 years older than him totally doesnt have this stage. So when I was bombarded by his persistent why, I was quite miffed. But later I realized that he was not being cheeky. This was what happened on the day my temper got short.

4 of us were about to board a double decker bus. The bus windows were totally covered with advertisement pictures. In the bus, I was engrossed talking to my husband when my son persistently ask why he can see sceneries from the bus window. Shouldn't the advertisement picture covers his view? I ignored his question at first but after being asked persistently, I stopped my conversation with my husband, quickly explain the reason why. As I was still reeling over the fact that I was interrupted while talking, I post back the same question that he asked me the following day. He patiently repeated my explanation that I have given to him the day before. Later on, I also realize that for whatever question that he asked along with his why, what if & deduction, my answer will be used as a fact or discussion points in his nursery class.

The incident makes me realize that he is truly interested in knowing the answer and not being a pest. I now will try to answer his series of questions. I will usually use the layman term & simplify my explanation so that he is able to understand. Years on, when I ask back the same question that was thrown to me, he is able to answer them. For those that I don't know, I just reply that I don't know the answer. Or promise to find out & will revert when I am less busy.

Is the inquisitive stage applies to all kids & when do this stage stop? He is now 7 & is still asking. Why do his kindergarten teacher feels that his series of question arises due to his lack of faith in her teaching when all kids have the same stage?

EN
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Postby jedamum » Sun Sep 14, 2008 1:46 pm

EN wrote: Why do his kindergarten teacher feels that his series of question arises due to his lack of faith in her teaching when all kids have the same stage?

EN,
I think that kindergarten teacher is simply impatient.
My ds1 also asked alot of questions as to why and how in class (as feedback during the meet parents session), and the teachers are very happy that he think through what is taught in class and ask when in doubt. The teachers also told me that they are sometimes dumbfolded by his questions but will explain to him that they'll find out before letting him know.
that's the spirit of teaching.

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Postby EN » Mon Sep 15, 2008 8:17 am

Hi Jedamum

I would be impatient too if 20 kids under my care share similar traits. There are also times that the why arises because he is checking which information that he has is correct. The one he read, from his mummy or teacher. If he finds there are discrepancies in his teacher's answer, the following day, he bring his book & inform the teacher why he thinks the answer is as such. He will continue his why again to seek his teacher opionion & it will be a never ending story until he is satisfied he covers all the options. The teacher feedback to me immediately & not wait for parents teacher meeting session to relate her story.

EN
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Postby jedamum » Mon Sep 15, 2008 10:49 am

EN wrote:He will continue his why again to seek his teacher opionion & it will be a never ending story until he is satisfied he covers all the options.

:?:
Is it cos the teachers did not give a satisfying answer during the first query? Yes, its true that the teacher may be overwhelmed by the size of the class. Perhaps its good to let your kid knows about that constraint and encourage him to approach you instead for the entire explanation. Sometimes, teachers in class just want to cover the basics for the whole class and move on to another topic under there list/schedule.

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Re: Why? Why? Why?

Postby mumwgals » Mon Sep 15, 2008 3:19 pm

ChiefKiasu wrote:Me :roll: : "MP3? It's a lossy compression method for converting analog audio into digital by sampling the source at high data rates while dropping frequencies that exceed the threshold which are unlikely to be noticeable by normal human hearing capabilities."
Him: Silence.
Me: "Understand?"
Him: "Yuh."


Chief, that's a good one!!! :lol: :lol:

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Postby tamarind » Mon Sep 15, 2008 4:01 pm

Yesterday my hubby showed my kids the newspaper report of the train crash in Los Angeles.

My hubby said : "The train crash left 17 people dead, and 135 people injured."

My boy asked : "Why not all die ?" :shock: :shock:

We are all very shocked by his question. I thought Confucius said that all human beings are born with kindness. My girl is very caring and shows compassion since she was 2 years old. So it is definitely not due to our environment at home.

My hubby didn't know how to react. I told my boy that he cannot say things like that. Those people who died, have Daddys and Mommys who will be very sad. Or they may have children who will be very sad if Daddy/Mommy never come home. Hopefully he will have compassion when he grows up.

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Postby EN » Mon Sep 15, 2008 4:22 pm

Hi Tamarind

Do you think your son is trying to ask "how come there is seven survivors when the train crash is so bad"?

Hi Jeda

I don't blame the teacher & I agree that the teacher wants to cover the basic. She does not expect a child of that age will be reading on a topic deeply & start to analyse the facts.

Hi ChiefKiasu

After giving your son the detailed explanation, does it deters him from asking so many questions? Does he remembers the answers to the questions that he asked?

EN
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Postby tamarind » Mon Sep 15, 2008 5:38 pm

EN wrote:Hi Tamarind

Do you think your son is trying to ask "how come there is seven survivors when the train crash is so bad"?


He is only 4 years old, he does not understand how bad a train crash is. Perhaps he does not even know what is the meaning of death.

It is not easy to answer a question by a child :roll:

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Postby ChiefKiasu » Tue Sep 16, 2008 7:28 am

EN wrote:...Hi ChiefKiasu

After giving your son the detailed explanation, does it deters him from asking so many questions? Does he remembers the answers to the questions that he asked?


I just asked him the same question he asked me 5 years ago. His answer? "Music Player 3 lor"

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