How lucky you are!

Getting your child into that dream Primary school is just the start of a 6 year journey. Discuss issues you face with supporting your child's studies in Primary schools.
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How lucky you are!

Postby mahes_gopal » Sat Oct 02, 2010 9:48 pm

Sometimes I get very tired of parents posting complaining that their kids are not performing up to standard. They are not in the top class top school or top whatever.
Yet I would like to share some of my experience as a special needs educator and parent with such parents.
I have 3 boys my youngest is too young to be tested but my two elder boys have been tested to have high IQs but are not performing well school because of their learning disability. So even though they are very smart they cannot transfer their knowledge without error onto their exam paper hence it leads to alot of frustration to me and them. But we just learn to except the situation that they may never be top in class although they understand all that is being taught. Plus due their learning disability they show a lack of interest in doing any assessments or exam papers.
Then there is this group of dyslexic kids that I teach.
The 1st group parents come to me with children scoring single digit and ask to me to help them. Many of the also have attention and emotional problems due to prolonged failure. Getting this children to believe in themself is a herculean task. Getting them to do work is another.With my help I have pushed several students to pass grade and when they reach the pass they are estatic. They feel like the top student in the world.
Then there is also this group of parents who children are also dyslexic but are passing but want them to do on par with non dyslexic children. They fail to realise that the children have a issue and that even with umpteeth tuitions they may just still pass. I know of dyslexic girl who has two maths tuitions two science tuitions and one english tuition and mother coaches in all the subjects too. But the lucky part is the girl is very diligent has no attention problems and can study 12 to 14 hrs a day without break and never complains.
How lucky these parents are?
Here there are parents like me who feel that if my son can finish the exam paper with getting distracted I am lucky forget about pass!
Dear parents the next time you complain that your child is not in the top class or top school or not performing at band 1 pls spare a thought for parents like us who are struggling every day trielessly.
Pls count your blessing if you have children who will do as many assessment as you want and attend as many tutions and will practice all the maths questions without giving up.
There are parents like me who live one day at a time.

mahes_gopal
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Postby IJJ » Sat Oct 02, 2010 10:49 pm

Thanks for the reminder. Yes. I count my blessings!

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Postby girlmum » Sat Oct 02, 2010 11:54 pm

Well said or rather Well Written, mahes_gopal!
I count my blessings and still counting.... :pray: especially my DD1 had just recovered from suspected dengue fever.
Many of us take the blessing for granted and most of the time fail to notice that. (I am guilty of this at times.... I must confess)
How many of us as parents can really live each day by telling yourself "How lucky you are...."? Not much, I guess :?

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Re: How lucky you are!

Postby ChiefKiasu » Sun Oct 03, 2010 4:08 pm

mahes_gopal wrote:Sometimes I get very tired of parents posting complaining that their kids are not performing up to standard. They are not in the top class top school or top whatever.
Yet I would like to share some of my experience as a special needs educator and parent with such parents.
I have 3 boys my youngest is too young to be tested but my two elder boys have been tested to have high IQs but are not performing well school because of their learning disability. So even though they are very smart they cannot transfer their knowledge without error onto their exam paper hence it leads to alot of frustration to me and them. But we just learn to except the situation that they may never be top in class although they understand all that is being taught. Plus due their learning disability they show a lack of interest in doing any assessments or exam papers.
Then there is this group of dyslexic kids that I teach.
The 1st group parents come to me with children scoring single digit and ask to me to help them. Many of the also have attention and emotional problems due to prolonged failure. Getting this children to believe in themself is a herculean task. Getting them to do work is another.With my help I have pushed several students to pass grade and when they reach the pass they are estatic. They feel like the top student in the world.
Then there is also this group of parents who children are also dyslexic but are passing but want them to do on par with non dyslexic children. They fail to realise that the children have a issue and that even with umpteeth tuitions they may just still pass. I know of dyslexic girl who has two maths tuitions two science tuitions and one english tuition and mother coaches in all the subjects too. But the lucky part is the girl is very diligent has no attention problems and can study 12 to 14 hrs a day without break and never complains.
How lucky these parents are?
Here there are parents like me who feel that if my son can finish the exam paper with getting distracted I am lucky forget about pass!
Dear parents the next time you complain that your child is not in the top class or top school or not performing at band 1 pls spare a thought for parents like us who are struggling every day trielessly.
Pls count your blessing if you have children who will do as many assessment as you want and attend as many tutions and will practice all the maths questions without giving up.
There are parents like me who live one day at a time.


Thanks, mahes_gopal. A very timely reminder indeed. I'll remember to hug my son for just completing his homework without dragging his feet :)

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Re: How lucky you are!

Postby schweppes » Sun Oct 03, 2010 5:01 pm

mahes_gopal wrote:
....

There are parents like me who live one day at a time.


:goodpost: mahes_gopal. You are right to say that for some parents, we live one day at a time. There is much to be grateful for, and we need to celebrate the little victories in our lives.

I read this somewhere and this has become one of my favourite quotes. Something I try to remind myself of my kids everyday,

"Love our children today. We worry about what our children will become tomorrow, and yet we forget that they are someone special today"

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Postby Trapwithin » Mon Oct 04, 2010 2:23 pm

Well said .. :goodpost:

A good reminder during this period of time ...

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Re: How lucky you are!

Postby jasmineong » Mon Oct 04, 2010 2:31 pm

mahes_gopal wrote:Sometimes I get very tired of parents posting complaining that their kids are not performing up to standard.... Many of the also have attention and emotional problems due to prolonged failure. Getting this children to believe in themself is a herculean task. Getting them to do work is another.With my help I have pushed several students to pass grade and when they reach the pass they are estatic. They feel like the top student in the world.

How lucky these parents are?
Here there are parents like me who feel that if my son can finish the exam paper with getting distracted I am lucky forget about pass!
Dear parents the next time you complain that your child is not in the top class or top school or not performing at band 1 pls spare a thought for parents like us who are struggling every day trielessly.

There are parents like me who live one day at a time.


Thank you Mahes for this timely reminder..I just want to love and treasure my kids without complaining about their performance after reading this..I realize that my kids will grow up insecure if they think mummy and daddy loves them when they do well only..you have reminded me today that there are so many other parents out there dealing with a thousand more difficult issues than mine and we should take time to just love the kids :goodpost:

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Re: How lucky you are!

Postby starlight1968sg » Mon Oct 04, 2010 2:38 pm

mahes_gopal wrote:Sometimes I get very tired of parents posting complaining that their kids are not performing up to standard. They are not in the top class top school or top whatever.
Yet I would like to share some of my experience as a special needs educator and parent with such parents.
I have 3 boys my youngest is too young to be tested but my two elder boys have been tested to have high IQs but are not performing well school because of their learning disability. So even though they are very smart they cannot transfer their knowledge without error onto their exam paper hence it leads to alot of frustration to me and them. But we just learn to except the situation that they may never be top in class although they understand all that is being taught. Plus due their learning disability they show a lack of interest in doing any assessments or exam papers.
Then there is this group of dyslexic kids that I teach.
The 1st group parents come to me with children scoring single digit and ask to me to help them. Many of the also have attention and emotional problems due to prolonged failure. Getting this children to believe in themself is a herculean task. Getting them to do work is another.With my help I have pushed several students to pass grade and when they reach the pass they are estatic. They feel like the top student in the world.
Then there is also this group of parents who children are also dyslexic but are passing but want them to do on par with non dyslexic children. They fail to realise that the children have a issue and that even with umpteeth tuitions they may just still pass. I know of dyslexic girl who has two maths tuitions two science tuitions and one english tuition and mother coaches in all the subjects too. But the lucky part is the girl is very diligent has no attention problems and can study 12 to 14 hrs a day without break and never complains.
How lucky these parents are?
Here there are parents like me who feel that if my son can finish the exam paper with getting distracted I am lucky forget about pass!
Dear parents the next time you complain that your child is not in the top class or top school or not performing at band 1 pls spare a thought for parents like us who are struggling every day trielessly.
Pls count your blessing if you have children who will do as many assessment as you want and attend as many tutions and will practice all the maths questions without giving up.
There are parents like me who live one day at a time.


Thanks so much for sharing. It is really a timely reminder as year-end exam is round the corner and I am one of them who is guilty of stuffing past exam papers down dd's throat (so to speak), thinking that I am doing for her good and all sorts of valid reasons.

Life is a process. No doubt the grades are important but they are not the most important in our lifes. I should look beyond just the grades in the report book.

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Postby hquek » Mon Oct 04, 2010 3:18 pm

True true. When my boys treats supermarkets, shopping centres, bank branches like a race track or fighting arena, I have to keep reminding myself to be grateful that they are mentally and physically able - aside from the case of super paisehness I feel. A lady at supermarket actually looked at me with pity (works better than disdain which I got another time :wink: ).

They are healthy and well - for that I give thanks.

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Postby duriz » Mon Oct 04, 2010 3:23 pm

:goodpost:

Thank you for sharing mahes_gopal
Everyday I'm thankful for my DD :love:

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