Be your child's coach

Getting your child into that dream Primary school is just the start of a 6 year journey. Discuss issues you face with supporting your child's studies in Primary schools.
Forum rules Gentle reminder before posting questions in the Academic Support Forums: Please ensure you post your question in the correct thread. Try not to start new threads.

Be your child's coach

Postby tianzhu » Fri Jun 06, 2008 7:43 pm

Be your child's coach

Have you ever lost your cool while helping your kids to do school work?
Doing homework together helps in bonding with your children, but if not handled appropriately, the outcome may be disastrous.
Please share your ways of anger management.

Posts: 3789
Joined: Fri May 30, 2008 8:10 pm
Total Likes: 5

Postby Luvkid » Fri Apr 10, 2009 12:16 am


Yes, agree with u studying with kid is indeed a good bonding, so called QUALITY time. Cos we make effort to sit beside for at least minimum 1/2 hour a day.

I just started the daily study/revision with my boy when he was K2 last year. I admit, i had been ERUPTING and ended up with screaming. :(

I know this can never be carried on forever. From then on, before a VOLCANO starts, i close my eyes and tell myself: he really dun know how to do it, that why he can't do so. So put in my unlimited patience towards him.

Now i get less flared up and of cos in time to come, i hope i can totally overcome it.. :pray:

Posts: 457
Joined: Wed Apr 08, 2009 3:36 pm
Total Likes: 0


Postby buds » Fri Apr 10, 2009 1:59 am

[Moderator's note: Topic selected for Portal publication.]

We never thought, that sometimes WE ARE our own setbacks...
Why? Read on...

A vital part of the learning process involves the taking of risks and the
making of "mistakes". If children are to develop their potential, they
must be challenged and find some tasks difficult. It is important that
children deal with setbacks (note : the word failure has been avoided).

Parents have an important role in helping their children to cope with
setbacks. For example, at some stages... your child has probably said
something like... "I am just no good at spelling" or "I really cannot draw"
and it may be that you may HAVE TRIED to reassure him by saying
something along the lines of, "You cannot be good at everything..."
But if this is the case, your child may pick up the message that it is
ACCEPTABLE to give up trying to succeed at certain things.

Your intentions may be good, but there is a strong chance that your
child might develop the belief that you sometimes expect him to fail.
In the way that many adults invent creative excuses to explain why
they should not do or try things, these young kiddies too, can develop
negative self image and limit their achievements because they expect

It is important to teach all our children that to become proficient in any
skill or subject, be it sports skills, at math or playing the violin, there
are times when there will be difficulties to be surmounted. If they equate
"difficulty" with "failure", our children are likely to give up every time...
On the other hand, if we regard a setback as an opportunity for learning,
the concept of difficulty takes a whole new meaning.

Encourage our children to approach tasks in variety of ways in order to
look for a solution and to think and believe that the next time, I will....
There was a song i learnt in school which went like this...
"If at first you don't succeed, try... try... again..."
However, on a more encouraging note it should now be sung like this..

:rahrah: "If at first you don't succeed, try a different way!" :rahrah:

*No point being bent on old school train of thought - of like when the
time we were at school, when there was only one way of learning
everything.... and if we didn't learn it that way, we're left behind...
and that we will eventually be.... failures...

*With new age, comes new skills... we can be more creative...
There are different ways to solve one problem.. the only setback is
ourselves. If we set the expectations on how WE managed to do it
successfully before, that our children simply can't, that is already a
point of no return... :(

Success comes in cans, not can'ts... so be positive and tell our children
we appreciate their efforts. Encourage them to believe in their own
abilities - to remind her of what they do well in. Ask our children every
day, what was the best thing that happened to them that day... and ask
what they are looking forward to tomorrow. Praise them at the point that
they have done something that pleases you - and as many of us have
discussed here - to be specific about what it was that we thought that
was good! :idea:

Remind our children of the successes that they have achieved despite
having difficulties along the way. This may help them realise that
setbacks can be overcome... and we're always here for them every
step of the way in success or in setbacks. :wink:


Posts: 22728
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2008 3:21 am
Total Likes: 85

Return to Primary Schools - Academic Support