NOT ALLOW TRANSFER CLASS ??? BEATEN BY CLASSMATE

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NOT ALLOW TRANSFER CLASS ??? BEATEN BY CLASSMATE

Postby chy » Fri Jan 15, 2010 10:52 pm

Hi,

Did any one know, in Singapore primary NOT allow transfer class????

My kid being beaten by the classmate more the 6 mths from last year(P1), after numurious time complaints to the class teachear and repllied will work closely or monitoring claosely, but...after few months the beating still continuie...we been sending email to teacher, the principal and cc to moe for requesting changing class, but..not allow...still remain monitor excusice.

From then , my son developed the FEAR to go to school or cryied at night at first.....slowly...he kind of changing his attitude....

When the new school reopen...in year 2010 (P2), the beating started again ...

After complaint to MOE this week, the superintendent from MOE asked for the arrangement meeting with the principle and vise principle to request transfer class...but, both P & VP insisted that there was no ground of changing class...

We kind of loss...as a parent, will you continue sending you kid to school, by knowing he will continue being beaten by the classmate, yet, the school still remain monitoring....or should second incident happen again.

Did any one parent have such incidents before??? :?: :?: :?

chy
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Postby pecalis » Fri Jan 15, 2010 11:35 pm

Bully is a very serious case. However, as parents, we must really check and verify first (my child told me vivid stories about what happened in class just to keep me interested or entertained and to my horror, after checking with the FT, no such thing happened in class) with the form teacher, and especially classmates (need to have reliable witnesses) before going to the P or even MOE. Once you're certain that our child is being bullied, you should go all out to help him and if the sch is still unhelpful, even with MOE stepping in (which is unlikely), I would transfer my child to another sch.

Not sure if this helps???

pecalis
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Re: NOT ALLOW TRANSFER CLASS ??? BEATEN BY CLASSMATE

Postby verykiasu2010 » Sat Jan 16, 2010 12:06 am

chy wrote:Hi,

Did any one know, in Singapore primary NOT allow transfer class????

My kid being beaten by the classmate more the 6 mths from last year(P1), after numurious time complaints to the class teachear and repllied will work closely or monitoring claosely, but...after few months the beating still continuie...we been sending email to teacher, the principal and cc to moe for requesting changing class, but..not allow...still remain monitor excusice.

From then , my son developed the FEAR to go to school or cryied at night at first.....slowly...he kind of changing his attitude....

When the new school reopen...in year 2010 (P2), the beating started again ...

After complaint to MOE this week, the superintendent from MOE asked for the arrangement meeting with the principle and vise principle to request transfer class...but, both P & VP insisted that there was no ground of changing class...

We kind of loss...as a parent, will you continue sending you kid to school, by knowing he will continue being beaten by the classmate, yet, the school still remain monitoring....or should second incident happen again.

Did any one parent have such incidents before??? :?: :?: :?



Can also request to meet with the aggressor's parents.

You mean principal also defy the request of MOE to transfer class for the kid ?
verykiasu2010
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NOT ALLOW TRANSFER CLASS ??? BEATEN BY CLASSMATE

Postby 2centsworthy » Sat Jan 16, 2010 3:25 am

Dear chy,
Request to meet aggressor's parents - I do not think that's good. usually it is good to let the school handle. If the school is not forthcoming, go to the next level... which is the superintendent... if not, move on to the next level Minister copy superintendent and principal (if you are desperate to stand on). Parents tend to get very defensive and it can turn ugly... there are cases with parents suing each other... ultimately settle cost out of court. My neighbour retired from MOE psychology dept... he told me parents can be overly protective and defensive.

I would do what pecalis suggested... check for reliable witnesses... get your child to write down what happened ... starting with the most recent cases. If the aggressor only bullies your child, then changing his seating arrangement would normally help. Since the kids normally move up from p1 to p2 in the same class, then lots of the kids know who are the "outstanding" ones. However, changing schools may not solve your child's problem. Changing schools would mean your child would join a class whereby the bonding is already there... and your child might be a loner. My child joined his sibling when his older sibling went into a GEP school. He cried for one month and there's an adjustment period... can even be a year. Perhaps you want to teach your child how to handle bullies... how to rally for support from friends... and stay with friends... keep clear from bullies... Going to another school is the easy way out... but may face similar problems if child is not taught certain skills to handle bullies. Every school has got bullies - Nanyang, RGPS, Nan Hua, Tao nan, Cat Hi... It's better to teach our kids to keep themselves safe... empower them with skills... face up to problem and handle them. It can even boost your child's confidence when he overcome the situation.

However changing schools might help... provided you change to the right school. Which one? One which has got a better discipline... one which does not push too much for academic... one which children loves going to school to type. All the TOP primary schools are rather like pressure cooker - school push... parents tend to push... kids rebel. Set your priorities right. Consider carefully and speak with your child... else your child may grow up with perception that if you are not happy with a situation, change job, change country of residence... nothing's perfect.

2centsworthy
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Postby tankee » Sat Jan 16, 2010 7:28 am

Go and seek your MP's help. His/her 1 letter to the right party can do wonders.

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Postby mrswongtuition » Sat Jan 16, 2010 8:07 am

You mentioned that he was beaten up repeatedly, I'm sure there are some physical hurt involved?

Did you bring your child for a proper medical examination to verify the cause of the injuries?

If this is going to happen again, I suggest you buy a hidden camera for your child. There are quite a few in the market. It will not cost more than $150. The one I'm using now is a pen. Looks like a normal pen but it can records up to 4 hours of video. Got it from Sim Lim. Ask you boy to clip the pen to his shirt. If he's going to be beaten up again (the same kid comes near him), quickly switch it on to film the whole event.

I'm sorry if my suggestion means that your child may get beaten up 1 more time but you really need solid evidence since the school does not seem to be doing anything about it.

I've seen cases of kids who are allowed to transfer school due to such bullying. From what I heard from the parents of the child, the transfer was arranged by MOE when they made a complaint and produced medical reports.

Please do not meet with the aggressor's parents until you have solid evidence. They may accuse your child of beating their son instead!

mrswongtuition
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Postby tianzhu » Sat Jan 16, 2010 9:38 am

Hi
There is an article on bullying in today’s ST.

Bullying in S'pore schools @ pg A16

Best wishes

tianzhu
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Postby verykiasu2010 » Sat Jan 16, 2010 10:59 am

the school is hopeless when the principal is hopeless in not able to deal with bullies under his nose
verykiasu2010
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Re: NOT ALLOW TRANSFER CLASS ??? BEATEN BY CLASSMATE

Postby VitoRelax » Sat Jan 16, 2010 12:12 pm

verykiasu2010 wrote:Can also request to meet with the aggressor's parents.

You mean principal also defy the request of MOE to transfer class for the kid ?

If principal also defy the request of MOE, then call up the reporter from New Paper lah.

Your case will be highlighted & investigated immediately !!

VitoRelax
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Postby julongmum » Sun Jan 17, 2010 12:10 am

My heart goes with the boy and parents, very heart pain in hearing this. Do all the possible as suggested by other parents here.

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