KiasuParents - Parenting in Singapore

I once talked to a P6 boy just after the PSLE what did he want to do after
the exam, he said "I will burn all my books bec I had enough of studying".
My son's friend committed suicide when he was in P6
due to study pressure.
Enough said.

As parents we want the best for the children, we try to provide the best opportunity and groom them for success. Unfortunately some people take that as being 1st is everything but there's only one 1st position so does that make the top 10 positions or lower losers? It seems so. This I think is a Singaporean disease. There's very little appreciation for the effort put in, there's too much glorification for being in 1st position.

We always strive to be number one at all cost. We have seen so many cases of students going through study fatigue, death and suicides but does the pressure stop? NO.

It is easy to say.. yes, strike a balanced lifestyle but how can parents even let the kids let their guard down about their studies and CCAs. It is a very competitive and stressful place to be in.

Parents are in a dilemma because it they do not push their children, they fear that they will end up as "losers". Who can blame them.
So we end up in this perpetually vicious cycle of increased stress levels for everyone especially the children.

Personally my husband and I believe in holistic approach in raising our children, we want them not only to be bright, strong and healthy but also kind, appreciative and respectful. But we struggle with time when it comes to being able to let them just run around and be themselves, enjoy their childhoood cos the demands on their studies is very high.
Time needed for extra lessons, CCAs and enrichment classes take up majority of the time.

Cut down enrichment? Sure.. which one should go first? It's a tough balancing act. In the end, you have to decide what's the best combi ( less extra classes/CCA and more family time or more classes/CCAs and less family time ) for your family and kids and go with that. There will definitely be trade offs but that's the way it seems to be these days.

If the child is already in the 6 year IP program in secondary school, is the CCA important?. Since there is no JC admission required they do not need the two bonus points for the CCA. So can they stay as a recreation member in the team.

What is the average CCA hours nowadays?
I checked my sons's concert band schedule and it is about 11 hours a
week (3 sessions a week) and more if there is competition coming up.
Wow, is it the same for others too or only for those 'hot' programs only?
I did not know CCA takes up such long hours nowadays.

Hi pinky,

I think for performing arts such as band or dance and sports, practices will take about 2-3 times a week (about 3-4 hours each).
Joining a club may be less hectic.

My son has his CCA on Mon, Wed and Fri. He is back home at about 7 plus on those days. I actually advise him to join a club initially but he is an energetic and sporty boy, so clubs are out for him... He is into sports. He says it's tiring but fun.

csc wrote:Hi pinky,

I think for performing arts such as band or dance and sports, practices will take about 2-3 times a week (about 3-4 hours each).
Joining a club may be less hectic.

Yes, that is true. Also, if the school has band as "hot" CCA, meaning the band is good enough to bring in awards, the instructor and teachers will be under pressure to improve or at least maintain standard so they must clock in more hours.

For sec sch bands, every 2 years, about 4-6 months before SYF (which should be in April? not sure), practice will intensify and this means more hours.

Plus, performing groups means they must perform, right? So before performances, practice hours also go up.

ADD: Sch bands tend to alternate their major concerts with SYF. If this year they have SYF, they may only have a small, informal concert or free public performance like in shopping malls for this year. Then, next year, they will have their major, formal concert where they will charge for admission.

Thanks csc and schellen for your explanation.
My son is very enthusiastic being in the band despite the tiring marching under the hot sun so I guess it's half a battle won.
I must agree that interest should come first then will they stay committed.

pinky wrote: My son is very enthusiastic being in the band despite the tiring marching under the hot sun

Military Band!! Formations!!!
We marched and trained in the rain too!!
Sweet sweet memories....

sms wrote:If the child is already in the 6 year IP program in secondary school, is the CCA important?. Since there is no JC admission required they do not need the two bonus points for the CCA. So can they stay as a recreation member in the team.

I share the same question too. Someone seemed to say it will then be for them to prepare for uni enrolment, turure scholorship and award. But not sure how true it is or if anyone know of any official website that publish this criteria.

Similarly, does it mean the IP students who will not be doing 'O' level will not have to take 'o'level Chinese at sec three? What if an IP student fail HCL in sec 4?