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In-law problems?

Successful parenting is founded on successful relationships between spouses and relatives. We must not neglect our spouse while we focus our attention on grooming our children to become the best they can be. Discuss relationship issues here.

If you have a choice, would you stay with your in laws?

Yes
52
7%
No
685
93%
 
Total votes : 737

Re: In-law problems?

Postby vinegar » Tue Feb 13, 2018 9:14 pm

Think my feelings towards my dh is totally opposite with mrskiasu. We argue more in the recent yrs. Sometimes i feel he argue fr sake of argument. I suspect he is going to be menopause?? Very picky n fussy in the recent yrs. I don't enjoy talking with him. Even think of excuses not to going traveling with him coz going out with him is pressurizing. I feel relaxing going with friends.

vinegar
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Re: In-law problems?

Postby lee_yl » Tue Feb 13, 2018 9:25 pm

MrsKiasu wrote:
lee_yl wrote:
MrsKiasu wrote::lol: leeyl..I told dh that I write to kakis..and I suspect he reads my posts too :lol:



The other day we talked about your ah Lao, how har? :lol:


spending more time on heart to heart talk, leeyl..we had wine after kids slept..morning when I woke up by my alarm clock I went out to the living hall and sat on the sofa want to continue with my sleep :lol: spring cleaning job havent finished..think I should just close my eyes la. hey, cny decor started selling at 50% disc liao. i bought the 'fu' for next year cny :laugh:


MKS,
I feel happy for you upon hearing that.
Heart to heart talk connects couple.
Wooo... 酒后乱性 :evil:

Why do u need to keep the fu for next year? Can use this year then recycle again. I am still in dilemma whether I should throw away last year’s Xmas decor or keep it until Dec.

lee_yl
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Re: In-law problems?

Postby lee_yl » Tue Feb 13, 2018 9:25 pm

MrsKiasu wrote:leeyl, our fan si so power lor..he sucked away all your youth arh? tell him leave some la :lol:

采阴补阳? :faint:

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Re: In-law problems?

Postby janet88 » Tue Feb 13, 2018 9:27 pm

lee_yl wrote:Sometimes DH & I have different opinions, guess we try to see from the other party’s perspective. DH probably knows me inside out because he reads every single post of mine on KSP everyday.

i do worry when hubby retires one day. he will be meddling in everything i do. told hubby not to create any KSP account (even though it's a public forum) to read my posts, because this is the avenue for me to yak and vent my frustrations.

sometimes i tell him so and so kaki from KSP recommended this and that. it's good to know more people even though we do not have time to meet...but reading precious tips and information is really wonderful.

vinegar,
hubby seems to have aged recently...weekends are supposed to be fun and relaxing but he is so serious. he is also picky. many times i have to remind him to switch from work mode to weekend mode. saturday and sundays pass so quickly...by the time he is relaxed, it's almost the end of weekend :frustrated:

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Re: In-law problems?

Postby lee_yl » Tue Feb 13, 2018 9:28 pm

vinegar wrote:Think my feelings towards my dh is totally opposite with mrskiasu. We argue more in the recent yrs. Sometimes i feel he argue fr sake of argument. I suspect he is going to be menopause?? Very picky n fussy in the recent yrs. I don't enjoy talking with him. Even think of excuses not to going traveling with him coz going out with him is pressurizing. I feel relaxing going with friends.


Possible. My mum told me there was a period when my dad easily flared up over very minor things.

lee_yl
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Re: In-law problems?

Postby lee_yl » Tue Feb 13, 2018 9:49 pm

janet88 wrote:
lee_yl wrote:Sometimes DH & I have different opinions, guess we try to see from the other party’s perspective. DH probably knows me inside out because he reads every single post of mine on KSP everyday.

i do worry when hubby retires one day. he will be meddling in everything i do. told hubby not to create any KSP account (even though it's a public forum) to read my posts, because this is the avenue for me to yak and vent my frustrations.

sometimes i tell him so and so kaki from KSP recommended this and that. it's good to know more people even though we do not have time to meet...but reading precious tips and information is really wonderful.

Yes, often we share our woes here and kakis will console/counsel us and at the same time I also learn new tips.

Janet,
From your previous sharings, you are a wonderful wife who supported your DH to get thru his difficult times. Your hubby is stressed, maybe too many things on his mind, new job, new house, CNY, renovations...

lee_yl
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Re: In-law problems?

Postby MrsKiasu » Wed Feb 14, 2018 8:59 am

lee_yl wrote:
MrsKiasu wrote:
MKS,
I feel happy for you upon hearing that.
Heart to heart talk connects couple.
Wooo... 酒后乱性 :evil:

Why do u need to keep the fu for next year? Can use this year then recycle again. I am still in dilemma whether I should throw away last year’s Xmas decor or keep it until Dec.


your side also got this kind of pattern arh酒后乱性 :laugh:

have enough cny decor now..dd2 even have few self drawn and coloured doggie pasted plus few doggy origami. looking messy already :lol:

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Re: In-law problems?

Postby MrsKiasu » Wed Feb 14, 2018 9:01 am

vinegar wrote:Think my feelings towards my dh is totally opposite with mrskiasu. We argue more in the recent yrs. Sometimes i feel he argue fr sake of argument. I suspect he is going to be menopause?? Very picky n fussy in the recent yrs. I don't enjoy talking with him. Even think of excuses not to going traveling with him coz going out with him is pressurizing. I feel relaxing going with friends.


For this kind of situation better dont argue with him. Else sure explode

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Re: In-law problems?

Postby slmkhoo » Wed Feb 14, 2018 9:45 am

MrsKiasu wrote:
slmkhoo wrote:I like to think I'm a realist! My husband is much more positive and gung-ho about things, and in the early years, we had to learn to understand each other. Together, we balance each other well, and we have learned to combine our different perceptions to produce a more wholistic assessment of risks, and hopefully come to better decisions. We have learned that respect for each other's opinions is important, even if we don't agree. Just because someone is different doesn't necessarily mean they are wrong, just a different personality.


Looks like our combi about the same. But our differences were not so obvious when we were young. Guess for us, characters getting stronger as we age. I agree that we better to agree to disagree. Dh says that we could be together because we are different. I think respecting each other is more important. Both of us seldom raise voice at each other. Lately that kids are more grown up, we have more chance for getting to know each other again..feeling connected again after so many years of focusing on kids is really great.

I think our differences were more obvious in the early years. Over the years, we have learned to understand each other better, and probably influenced each other to some extent, so he is a bit less risk-taking, and I am a bit more brave. We are fortunate that we have been mostly involved in many of the same things over the years, so we don't have to reaquaint ourselves with each other.

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Re: In-law problems?

Postby janet88 » Wed Feb 14, 2018 9:47 am

lee_yl wrote:Janet,
From your previous sharings, you are a wonderful wife who supported your DH to get thru his difficult times. Your hubby is stressed, maybe too many things on his mind, new job, new house, CNY, renovations...

i do flare up when he goes overboard. now that we have secured a buyer, the new flat and renovation headaches are over. CNY is small thing. the kids and i often wonder why he is 'physically there but mentally somewhere'. he has a new job. finance wise, i know what is going on and it is not an issue. our household expenditure is lean.

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