KiasuParents - Parenting in Singapore

Can anyone tell me daddy bath for daughter healthy or not? my ex even bath in front our daughter. Daughter said to me she saw daddy bird bird (keep laugh with it).

note: she 4yrs 7mth old.

EileenHee wrote:Can anyone tell me daddy bath for daughter healthy or not? my ex even bath in front our daughter. Daughter said to me she saw daddy bird bird (keep laugh with it).

note: she 4yrs 7mth old.

Ummmhhhh. Set a age limit.
DH used to bath for DD but dun think he bath in front of her. While she has not seen DH, she did see her elder bro who is 1.5 year older. But we kinda educate them on their differences & both kids kinda want privacy from ~P1/2.

DH minimised bathing for DD from ~5yo & we started training them to bath themselves. Once trained, he stopped totally....only monitor her bathing skills (hands-off) initially.

Likewise, had a guy friend who loved hugging her when young (cos chubby Mah). But we told him hands-off by 7yo Guess it's always better to be safer.

It is quite rare to see a daddy handling the baby bath (at least for my case and none of my gf's hubby bathed their babies) so if that helps the bonding between daddy and baby - by all means.

however, I agree with BeContented that once Baby become a toddler, it is best that mummy handles the bath and train them to be independent. Teach the children to differentiate what kind of touching from stranger or close relatives are not appropriate and to "report" to mummy straight away.

Daddy bathing in front of DD is a definite No No for me.

Im so helpless & hopeless.

We had divorce. So no matter how i told him stop him. he think im crazy. he said im daughter father y cannot n that nothing wrong with it.

we have son too but he never want bath for him.

I dunno wat to do who can help mi abt tis matter.

Do you any family members from his side or friend you can ask to talk to him?

If not, maybe can sort help from MCYs ,ministry of community development, youth and sports for help. They can help to counsel him and make him see your concerns.

Worse come to worse which will definitely blow things up is to get a court order to compel him not to do such things with dd.

Hi Eileen, I think you have to stop this firmly.Stop allowing your Ex to bathe your DD, and worst he bathe infront of your DD. An the same time , educate DD now. Tell her don't allow anybody to undress her or touch her body. include your Ex.( in this case means baths her) Only Mummy , Grandmother or helper is allow.Teach her some privacy like don't let others see her pee. Sit properly with legs close, shame shame to show panty....etc. Start from your girl to protect herself. One day, she may not want daddy to bathe her anymore...

LOLMum wrote:Do you any family members from his side or friend you can ask to talk to him?

If not, maybe can sort help from MCYs ,ministry of community development, youth and sports for help. They can help to counsel him and make him see your concerns.

Worse come to worse which will definitely blow things up is to get a court order to compel him not to do such things with dd.

Have same thots as LOLMum.
Frankly I am concerned that he only wants to bath the gal & even bath in front of her. My DH used to help me out with BOTH the boy & girl when young. BOTH. Guess these days read too much of those news on daddies behaving inappropriately to their dd, so I'll rather be safe than sorry.
As a dad, he should understand why he should avoid certain things

Puzz...zzle;
Fr the day start i knw he keep wan bath daughter i already start teach her wat should n not. She even knw to reject him but i dunno wat he had said to her end up she allow him to do so.

BeContented;
Im dunno wat he thinking maybe he jus wan bath for her to maintain the bond wif her or mabye he feel more safe daughter near him since noone at hm. But i do feel tis not healthy at all for a growing up daughter.

no friend can help, his family member dun like mi..

wat sould i do? im so stress, worry, helpless n hopeless.. noone can help..

No need to be stressed. You obviously are afraid for your dd. stand firm and pick up the phone and talk to MCYs at 63 555 000.

Be safe than sorry. Once damage is done, you cannot reverse or erase it.

By the way, seeking help from MCYs doesn't mean your ex will go to jail or get unto trouble. Unless he has done bad things to his dd like touching her at inappropriate places or getting her to do indecent things on him.