The nature of forgiveness

Successful parenting is founded on successful relationships between spouses and relatives. We must not neglect our spouse while we focus our attention on grooming our children to become the best they can be. Discuss relationship issues here.

The nature of forgiveness

Postby buds » Sat May 10, 2014 4:05 pm

Are you a forgiving person?

Do you forgive people easily or at least readily, or are you the sort who bear death-grudges?

buds
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Re: The nature of forgiveness

Postby icy_mama » Sat May 10, 2014 4:10 pm

why such a thought provoking question, buds?

ok, to answer your question, i forgive and forget really fast. someone cuts into my lane this red light, i'll forgive and forget before i reach the next. :laugh:

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Re: The nature of forgiveness

Postby jjxy mum » Sat May 10, 2014 4:23 pm

As for me, I will forget then follow with forgive...bcos I'm forgetful.
btw, It also depend on how serious was that incident...

jjxy mum
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Re: The nature of forgiveness

Postby Funz » Sat May 10, 2014 4:57 pm

Hmmm.... we are not talking about small small matters right? We are talking about hurt and betrayal that cuts really deep?

I do not let people in easily and once I let them in, I think it will take a lot before I will give up on/hate that person. But once it reaches that point, it will also take a lot for me to forgive but I will never forget.

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Re: The nature of forgiveness

Postby SAHM_TAN » Sat May 10, 2014 5:51 pm

Recalling from my experiences. It is not a conscious effort, but after awhile, many unhappiness and the incidents seems unimportant and so the bad feelings that associated with the incidents will be gone too. Some incidents have consequences which affect present situation. When there are frustructions caused by the consequences, I will explain it is becos it is caused by previous incidents, but it is said without ill-feeling, just to serve as explanation to why something else is happening. It is said to gain understanding so that it will be easier to handle the situation as well as to be able to handle it in a calmer manner.

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Re: The nature of forgiveness

Postby starlight1968sg » Sat May 10, 2014 6:03 pm

buds,
It depends on the nature of matters.
Some matters not even worth getting angry nor feel hurt. There is no forgiveness to talk about.
Some matters hurt so much that I wish I could kill the one responsible. There is no forgiveness to talk about too because it cannot be forgiven until my eyes closed.

starlight1968sg
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Re: The nature of forgiveness

Postby sleepy » Sat May 10, 2014 6:27 pm

Funz wrote:Hmmm.... we are not talking about small small matters right? We are talking about hurt and betrayal that cuts really deep?

I do not let people in easily and once I let them in, I think it will take a lot before I will give up on/hate that person. But once it reaches that point, it will also take a lot for me to forgive but I will never forget.


Agreed. I have an inner circle too. For those of no major concern to me, i do forgive and forget very easily. i have extremely short memory on a daily basis.

The irony is the more important the person is to me, the harder to forgive. Even if forgive, i cant forget (even though i would like to)

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Re: The nature of forgiveness

Postby zbear » Sat May 10, 2014 7:27 pm

starlight1968sg wrote:buds,
It depends on the nature of matters.
Some matters not even worth getting angry nor feel hurt. There is no forgiveness to talk about.
Some matters hurt so much that I wish I could kill the one responsible. There is no forgiveness to talk about too because it cannot be forgiven until my eyes closed.



:goodpost:

I am also like you, starlight1968sg

zbear
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Re: The nature of forgiveness

Postby Jennifer » Sat May 10, 2014 9:13 pm

I am not a forgiving person.

Hurt feelings can be shelved, never forgotten. Once a while, they creep out of the closet.

My biggest weakness is I hv an excellent long term memory. Too good for my own good :gloomy:

Jennifer
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Re: The nature of forgiveness

Postby Integer » Sat May 10, 2014 9:21 pm

Jennifer wrote:I am not a forgiving person.

Hurt feelings can be shelved, never forgotten. Once a while, they creep out of the closet.

My biggest weakness is I hv an excellent long term memory. Too good for my own good :gloomy:

I'm like you.

( don't think it's appropriate to hi5 you ...)

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