KiasuParents - Parenting in Singapore

Sometimes, you need to meet a 'bad one' and realised 旧爱还是最美. It's all about fate.
Generally, when marriage becomes a bit bland, maybe like trying the 5 love languages and see if it helps before you make any decision.

nobody is perfect and individuals change as they age.

True. Even my love languages changed over the years

janet_lee88 wrote:nobody is perfect and individuals change as they age.

This is very true. PILs were very loving towards each other when I first married DH. There was peace in the family.

17 years later, both have changed n are at loggerheads everyday with each other. No peace n no tolerance.

people change along the way...when either party changes and starts to look around, marriage will turn sour.

janet_lee88 wrote:people change along the way...when either party changes and starts to look around, marriage will turn sour.

That's why part of the marriage commitment should be that couples commit to changing in tandem. Not necessarily to become identical, but to remain compatible. No-one actually told us that during our pre-marital counselling, but thankfully my husband and I worked it out over the years. We have both changed a lot in the nearly 30 yrs we've been married, and things have not turned out in ways we could have expected when we got married. Sometimes one or the other has had to wait while the other adjusts, or try to catch up with the other's changes.

janet_lee88 wrote:hi chixchix,
how is your sister?
hope that man has disappeared FOR GOOD from your sister's life.

Hi all ,,yes he has disappeared ..things became really bad...her hubby hit her after a fight on 22 oct,, she spoke about this to that " guy " and she did tell him that she can't tolerate anymore, he was on business trip and told her that he would speak to her at ease in a few days as he was going back to his own office. well sadly ,on 26 oct ,he messaged her a last time that he was riding his bike from the airport and will be reaching direct to Skype her soon .she waited the whole day,, till 27 oct ,in the early morning , his best mate messaged her that he was no more.. she went to his FB and there were Rest in peace messages..well she called his dad ,,and found out that just after his last sms to her, ,,he died in a road accident ..its been 2 weeks now, she is still very down ,, hmmmm ..i can't do much but just help to cheer her on ..


Quite sad though ,.he was the only one she could pour out everything to.

While I hope that guy disappeared for good, I didn't mean it for him to meet with such a tragedy. Hope your sister finds a purpose in life and do something about her marriage.

yeah she has tried talking to her husband a last time to let him know that she just wants a happy married life and is not asking for anything so big that he can't give...but it takes 2 hands to clap ..lets see i also can just pray the best for her

chixchix wrote:Hi all ,,yes he has disappeared ..things became really bad...her hubby hit her after a fight on 22 oct,, she spoke about this to that " guy " and she did tell him that she can't tolerate anymore, he was on business trip and told her that he would speak to her at ease in a few days as he was going back to his own office. well sadly ,on 26 oct ,he messaged her a last time that he was riding his bike from the airport and will be reaching direct to Skype her soon .she waited the whole day,, till 27 oct ,in the early morning , his best mate messaged her that he was no more.. she went to his FB and there were Rest in peace messages..well she called his dad ,,and found out that just after his last sms to her, ,,he died in a road accident ..its been 2 weeks now, she is still very down ,, hmmmm ..i can't do much but just help to cheer her on ..


Quite sad though ,.he was the only one she could pour out everything to.

Honestly, chixchix, the whole episode screams SCAM to me. I just hope that is the end of the episode, and that your sister has not sent over any money to the guy or his "family". Please advise your sister to look beyond her domestic troubles and be on her guard when dealing with his "family".