10 Habits of happy couples

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10 Habits of happy couples

Postby LKVM » Tue Mar 02, 2010 5:18 pm

Good article from psychologytoday.com

What does it take to be happy in a relationship? If you’re working to improve your marriage, here are a few habits of happy couples.

1. Go to bed at the same time
Remember the beginning of your relationship, when you couldn’t wait to go to bed with each other to make love? Happy couples resist the temptation to go to bed at different times. They go to bed at the same time, even if one partner wakes up later to do things while their partner sleeps.

2. Cultivate common interests
After the passion settles down, it’s common to realise that you have few interests in common. But don’t minimise the importance of activities you can do together that you both enjoy. If common interests are not present, happy couples develop them. At the same time, be sure to cultivate interests of your own; this will make you more interesting to your mate and prevent you from appearing too dependent.

3. Walk hand in hand or side by side
Rather than one partner lagging or dragging behind the other, happy couples walk comfortably hand in hand or side by side. They know it’s more important to be with their partner than to see the sights along the way.

4. Make trust and forgiveness your default mode
If and when they have a disagreement or argument, and if they can’t resolve it, happy couples default to trusting and forgiving rather than distrusting and begrudging.

5. Focus more on what your partner does right than what he or she does wrong
If you look for things your partner does wrong, you can always find something. If you look for what he or she does right, you can always find something, too. It all depends on what you want to look for. Happy couples accentuate the positive.

6. Hug each other as soon as you see each other after work
Our skin has a memory of “good touch” (loved), “bad touch” (abused) and “no touch” (neglected). Couples who say hello with a hug keep their skin bathed in the “good touch,” which can inoculate your spirit against anonymity in the world.

7. Say “I love you” and “Have a good day” every morning
This is a great way to buy some patience and tolerance as each partner sets out each day to battle traffic jams, long lines and other annoyances.

8. Say “Good night” every night, regardless of how you feel
This tells your partner that, regardless of how upset you are with him or her, you still want to be in the relationship. It says that what you and your partner have is bigger than any single upsetting incident.

9. Do a “weather” check during the day
Call your partner at home or at work to see how his or her day is going. This is a great way to adjust expectations so that you’re more in sync when you connect after work. For instance, if your partner is having an awful day, it might be unreasonable to expect him or her to be enthusiastic about something good that happened to you.

10. Be proud to be seen with your partner
Happy couples are pleased to be seen together and are often in some kind of affectionate contact - hand on hand or hand on shoulder or knee or back of neck. They are not showing off but rather just saying that they belong with each other.

Happy couples have different habits than unhappy couples. A habit is a discrete behaviour that you do automatically and that takes little effort to maintain. It takes 21 days of daily repetition of a new a behaviour to become a habit. So select one of the behaviours in the list above to do for 21 days and voila, it will become a habit...and make you happier as a couple. And if you fall off the wagon, don’t despair, just apologize to your partner, ask their forgiveness and recommit yourself to getting back in the habit.

If there was one key to happiness in love and life, and possibly even success, it would be to go into each conversation you have with this commandment to yourself front and foremost in your mind, "Just Listen."
Last edited by LKVM on Tue Mar 02, 2010 5:31 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Postby jedamum » Tue Mar 02, 2010 5:25 pm

hi,
how about considering quoting references of where you had chanced this from? :wink:

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Postby LKVM » Tue Mar 02, 2010 5:32 pm

jedamum wrote:hi,
how about considering quoting references of where you had chanced this from? :wink:


Yeah good :idea: , have updated the source!!

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Postby winth » Mon Mar 08, 2010 10:47 am

jedamum wrote:hi,
how about considering quoting references of where you had chanced this from? :wink:


I think it came from an article in the newspapers too (dun think it's the straits times).

DH cut this similar article out for me to read through couple weeks ago and was patting his own back on all the things he did 'right' :roll:

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Postby LKVM » Mon Mar 08, 2010 11:06 am

winth wrote:DH cut this similar article out for me to read through couple weeks ago and was patting his own back on all the things he did 'right' :roll:


Oh cute of him!! :P

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Re:

Postby tracychew » Wed Jun 01, 2016 8:09 pm

LKVM wrote:
winth wrote:DH cut this similar article out for me to read through couple weeks ago and was patting his own back on all the things he did 'right' :roll:


Oh cute of him!! :P


Haha I seem to notice it's a man thing to pat themselves on the back huh.. :imcool:

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Re: 10 Habits of happy couples

Postby kumpapasi » Fri Jun 24, 2016 6:33 am

I love the no. 2 Cultivate common interests. It's nice to have your love one as best friend. You learn a lot of things together and eventually become one with each other.

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Re: 10 Habits of happy couples

Postby Dusty2016 » Wed Jun 29, 2016 6:06 pm

This will also help you : https://showboxappdownloadio.com/

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Re: 10 Habits of happy couples

Postby makanbees » Wed Aug 03, 2016 11:31 am

Thanks for the link.

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Re: 10 Habits of happy couples

Postby Busybugz73 » Wed Aug 03, 2016 1:04 pm

Thanks for sharing, LKWM. Good food for thought, particularly when all of us are so busy with work, kids, extended family obligations, etc! The DHs are often neglected! And yes, we as wives are also often neglected by the DHs!

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