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Upgrading from boyfriend to husband

Postby Guest » Mon Jun 29, 2009 9:06 am

Dear IT Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slow down in the overall performance, particularly in the flower, gifts and jewellery applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6..5, but installed undesirable programs such as Formula One 5.0, NBA 3.0 and World Cup 2.0.

And now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Desperate Housewife


Dear Desperate Housewife,

First keep in mind:

Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Try entering the command C:\ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0 ..

If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Late Night Teh Tarik 6.1.

Late Night 6.1 is a very bad program that will create ?SnoringLoudly.wav files.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0..

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.

You might consider additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Sexy Dress 3.0 and Tongkat Ali 6.9.

Good Luck,
IT Support


Postby csc » Mon Jun 29, 2009 9:47 am


that's a good one...buddy!

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Postby nmhmum » Mon Jun 29, 2009 10:29 am

I have read this somewhere before. After reading again, I still find it is very funny. Infact there is another version is from girlfriend to wife.. hope someone can put the other version here for us to read. Thks ks2me. It brightens my day! :D

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Postby Guest » Mon Jun 29, 2009 10:45 am

Hey buddy, glad you enjoy the joke! :D

nmhmum, there seems to be a few's one for the upgrade from girlfriend to wife.

Dear Tech Support

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Racing 3.6 no longer run , crashing the system whenever selected.

I can’t seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I’m thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0 , but the uninstall doesn’t work on Wife 1.0 . Please help!

A Troubled User.


Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.
Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 , thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING !!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony -Child Support. I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application “Yes Dear” to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\ APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway
Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance . Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0 , Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2 ..

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

WARNING!!! DO NOT , under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 .. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,
Tech Support

Postby sunflower » Mon Jun 29, 2009 10:49 am

That's REALLY funny! Ha...ha.. :rotflmao:

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Postby Mr.Big » Mon Jun 29, 2009 12:22 pm

Lolol, this brightened up my Monday Morning!

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Postby ZacK » Mon Jun 29, 2009 12:42 pm

Thanks ks2me... Really had me laughing out loud! :rotflmao:

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Postby Guest » Mon Jun 29, 2009 7:47 pm

ZacK wrote:Thanks ks2me... Really had me laughing out loud! :rotflmao:

Zack, you are welcome, glad you have had some stomach exercise. :wink:

Postby MLR » Mon Jun 29, 2009 9:38 pm

Hiya ks2me

Thanks for sharing, chased my monday nite blues away . :goodpost:
Lov jokes of such :celebrate:

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Postby Jennifer » Mon Jun 29, 2009 10:19 pm

Thanks for sharing.

1st time reading these, very entertaining.

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