Jokes thread

[Funx3]

After a long silence, the young fellow looked up at his mother and asked, "If I thank the Lord for the broccoli, won't he know that I'm lying?"

[Funx3]

The other says, “Go home dad you’re drunk.”

Anti-Climax ....

[Funx3]

The little girl said, "I just know. And I know why you and Daddy got a divorce. You got an 'F' in sex."

F in sex .... Indeed!

[Funx3]

To which the little boy replies, "Actually, its the one with the wedding ring, but I do like the way YOU think!"

[Funx3]

After a confused silence, little Johnny volunteered - "I guess you'd be eating alone!"

she Really Asked for IT!

[stressedmother]

Haha ;D

[stressedmother]

Where u get your jokes from?

[Unsatisfied-Mum]

Three nuns are painting a room. However, they feel very hot so they decide to take off their clothes, since nobody can see them. Suddenly, there's a knock on the door. "Who is it?" the nuns call. "It's the blind man." comes the reply. They decide to let him in, because he cannot see them anyway. So the blind man comes in and says, "Alright sisters, where shall I put these blinds?"

[smartmummy]

A boy and his father were playing catch in the front yard when the boy saw a honey bee. He ran over and stomped it.

"That was a honey bee," his father said, "one of our friends. For stomping him you will do without honey for a week."

Later the boy saw a butterfly, so he ran over and stomped it.

"That was a butterfly," his father said, "one of our friends, and for stomping him you will do without butter for a week."

The next morning the family sat down for breakfast. The boy ate his plain toast with no honey or butter.

Suddenly a cockroach ran out from under the stove. His mother stomped it.

The boy looked at his father and said, "Are you going to tell her, Dad, or should I?"

[smartmummy]

Three boys are in the school yard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, "My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50."

The second boy says, "That's nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100."

Little Johnny says, "I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon, and it takes eight people to collect all the money!"