Child care or maid

With most families being dual-income-with-kids, outsourcing home cleaning and home economics to domestic helpers is almost a way of life for Singaporeans. Come in and discuss issues pertaining to maids and home management.

Child care or maid

Postby anlynn » Thu Mar 22, 2012 11:49 am

Hi parents,

Both my DS and DD are 2 and 5, i am a SAHM with no maid and parents assistance. I have tried to cope for a while but somehow it is getting out of hand.

I am wondering if i should get a maid to help me or send both my DS and DD to child care. i'm stuck in a dilemma now.

Any advise?

anlynn
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Re: Child care or maid

Postby Bigleg » Thu Mar 22, 2012 11:57 am

Its better you get a maid especially you are a SAHM. This way, you still can bond with your kids. As for me, I have been coping with Filipino maids all these while. I am a working mum. I prefer Filipino maids with graduate degrees so that they can teach my son too.

Bigleg
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Re: Child care or maid

Postby Peace Charlie » Thu Mar 22, 2012 1:40 pm

I'm a FTWM, have been employing helper for the past 12 yrs this year ve finally given up hope on helper. I have three schooling kids 11 & 8, 8 decided to put them at after school care to let them learn to be independence. If you r a SAHM, helper will be much better as u can bond with yr kids n oso u r at home n helper dare not up to mischief...

Peace Charlie
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Re: Child care or maid

Postby anlynn » Thu Mar 22, 2012 1:50 pm

Thanks Bigleg and Peace Charlie. I guess i have to get a maid and hope an okay one... won't hope to be a good one.

anlynn
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Re: Child care or maid

Postby buds » Thu Mar 22, 2012 2:03 pm

In what way has things gone out of hand?
Which area is it that you have challenges coping with?
I assume your five year old is attending preschool now?

Btw, I am SAHM since before I delivered my second child with three children aged 10, 8, 1. I also work freelance from home and my children are mostly homeschooled during preschool years and so far not attending tuition. Yet... :nailbite: We tried once for eldest but didnt work out..

buds
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Re: Child care or maid

Postby buds » Thu Mar 22, 2012 2:11 pm

I have posted some sharings here at this link on how I have been coping. :wink:

http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/blogs/buds

There's also fantastic discussion and more sharings on how the rest of us stay home parents maximize our time at home with household chores and the kiddies/babies. :D
http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/forum ... 49&t=33236

buds
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Re: Child care or maid

Postby anlynn » Thu Mar 22, 2012 2:12 pm

buds wrote:In what way has things gone out of hand?
Which area is it that you have challenges coping with?
I assume your five year old is attending preschool now?

Btw, I am SAHM since before I delivered my second child with three children aged 10, 8, 1. I also work freelance from home and my children are mostly homeschooled during preschool years and so far not attending tuition. Yet... :nailbite: We tried once for eldest but didnt work out..


Hi buds, i am stressed out taking care of both kids myself and also taking care of the housechores. Feel very exhausted everyday and not much time for myself.

anlynn
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Re: Child care or maid

Postby happy to be mum » Thu Mar 22, 2012 2:17 pm

anlynn wrote:
buds wrote:In what way has things gone out of hand?
Which area is it that you have challenges coping with?
I assume your five year old is attending preschool now?

Btw, I am SAHM since before I delivered my second child with three children aged 10, 8, 1. I also work freelance from home and my children are mostly homeschooled during preschool years and so far not attending tuition. Yet... :nailbite: We tried once for eldest but didnt work out..


Hi buds, i am stressed out taking care of both kids myself and also taking care of the housechores. Feel very exhausted everyday and not much time for myself.



hi buds,

salute you for taking care of 3 kiddos without any dometic help! :udawoman: how do you cope?

i contemplated to stop work and stop maid to take care of 2 kids full time but am really worried i cannot cope, in the end still working. It is really not easy unless your spouse will help you along which i know mine wun! Not that DH is not a good husband but it is just not him to be helping with the household chores and marketing, etc... and how to have the time to teach the kids if still need to cook, do housework etc...

happy to be mum
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Re: Child care or maid

Postby nms1 » Fri Mar 23, 2012 12:23 pm

anlynn wrote:
buds wrote:In what way has things gone out of hand?
Which area is it that you have challenges coping with?
I assume your five year old is attending preschool now?

Btw, I am SAHM since before I delivered my second child with three children aged 10, 8, 1. I also work freelance from home and my children are mostly homeschooled during preschool years and so far not attending tuition. Yet... :nailbite: We tried once for eldest but didnt work out..


Hi buds, i am stressed out taking care of both kids myself and also taking care of the housechores. Feel very exhausted everyday and not much time for myself.


If you are at SAHM I wouldn't recommend having a maid as you will lose all your privacy when you are at home and, as your children get older, you will have more time on your hands to look after them and the house and may find you don't really need her. If you really can't cope then get a part-time cleaner to come in and do the bigger chores - ironing, cleaning windows, cleaning furniture etc leaving you to just do the day-to-day cleaning and cooking.

If you want some time to yourself then see if your 2 year old can go to childcare for morning only and use that time to take a break. Alternatively, ask your husband to take over for a couple of hours at the weekend for you to go out. Forgive me if I'm wrong but it sounds like you are probably getting down from being at home all the time rather than really overwhelmed from the work. Some time of your one to go shopping, exercise, meet friends or just sit down with a coffee & a book might make all the difference.

nms1
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Re: Child care or maid

Postby Smurfkitty » Sat Mar 24, 2012 3:07 pm

anlynn wrote:Hi parents,

Both my DS and DD are 2 and 5, i am a SAHM with no maid and parents assistance. I have tried to cope for a while but somehow it is getting out of hand.

I am wondering if i should get a maid to help me or send both my DS and DD to child care. i'm stuck in a dilemma now.

Any advise?

I think u should get a part time maid to do cleaning for u since u are a SAHM mum... With a maid around, there is no privacy and u also have to take care of her well being etc.. If unluckily get a probe maid.. U even more stress.. And sending children to childcare will train them to be independent, make friends and learn more things in school, can save time sending them for enrichment class if childcare provide ..

I use to have maid and still send my elder when she is 4 to full day childcare. I m a full time mum.. With 2 kids - 2 and 6. Reasons being the maid said she cannot cope..anyway till now I have no regret cos she is more independent, confident and learn mrs things.. Her childcare has enrichment class like swimming, phonics, gym etc.. Thus, it save both me and her time to shuttle for those enrichment class.. Even childcare also toilet train them.. I tried but my girl refuse to cooperate.. The school manage to train her one day and she is ok... Peer pressure..

Anyway, now I am without maid, still full time working and both at childcare, have a part time cleaner come to my house every weekend . It's manageable.

If u have a maid, pls be reminded to keep properly your confidential things, money jewellery etc.and having maid equal to no privacy.. When times, u cannot bring them out , u left them at home u also scare they up to mischief.. I use to trust my previous 2 maids.. But not anymore for the new one.. I gave her freedom she abuse it and can tell u that if I m not happy and wants to go home, u just have to buy air tickets for me. See maid also know their right and tell u what she wants.. Think twice and have to be prepared if u really wants to engage maid.

Only when u do not have options, then consider engage maid as last resort..

Smurfkitty
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