Maid with Indecent Photos

With most families being dual-income-with-kids, outsourcing home cleaning and home economics to domestic helpers is almost a way of life for Singaporeans. Come in and discuss issues pertaining to maids and home management.

Maid with Indecent Photos

Postby chixchix » Tue Jun 25, 2013 9:08 pm

Hi all I am having a very bad migraine and I need some advise, I have kids at home who are about 9 years old. and I have been keeping my maid who has been with me since April 2012. I am her first employer. She is not able to cook well and there is always a dispute of food at home. So i brought in a 2nd maid ,who was an excellant cook and she stayed with me for 3 weeks ( she was temp) ,so in that 3 weeks,my maid has got lots of changes in her.She starts talking back with me and whenever i say anything to her, she cries and my husband will scold me, he tells me " how many maids must we change " and so it seems that its all my fault.

Today my maid went down so i checked her drawer and I saw on her 2nd spare phone, which she claims cant be used for calls but can take photos, I saw a picture of her vagina, then she posing in her bra, and then without a bra, she goes to the toilet at least 20 times a day. I am quite disturbed that she can do such things. She has no off day but when I send her to the shop she takes 30 min to come back.

Please advise what to do, I am afraid that my husband wont understand me.

chixchix
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Re: Maid with Indecent Photos

Postby POA Teacher » Tue Jun 25, 2013 10:26 pm

You must be joking!!!
After what you saw, you are still worried that your hubby will blame you?

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Re: Maid with Indecent Photos

Postby iRabbit » Tue Jun 25, 2013 10:58 pm

I've never had a maid before so what I'm going to say may come across as naive. Is it within employers' rights to peep at maids' phones? Just asking ...

iRabbit
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Re: Maid with Indecent Photos

Postby ngl2010 » Tue Jun 25, 2013 11:10 pm

Definitely must fire her. No need to tell your husband what you saw in the handphone because although we trust our husband, there is no need to plant certain things in his mind. Tell him that the maid had been seeing some boyfriends or some other reasons so you fired her. No need to have discussion at all with your husband.

I feel that husbands should not be involved in domestic issues. I had several maids before. I handled everything from the start till the end of employment. My maids only communicated with me but not to my husband. It is easier like that as I will be the only one that make all decisions. Men are usually weak when opposite gender is involved. Some maids are very clever. They will see who the weaker one and use that to their advantage.

Don't wait too long. I believe in tackling things early otherwise it will get even more difficult to fire her.

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Re: Maid with Indecent Photos

Postby HVR » Tue Jun 25, 2013 11:24 pm

ngl2010 wrote:Definitely must fire her. No need to tell your husband what you saw in the handphone because although we trust our husband, there is no need to plant certain things in his mind. Tell him that the maid had been seeing some boyfriends or some other reasons so you fired her. No need to have discussion at all with your husband.

I feel that husbands should not be involved in domestic issues. I had several maids before. I handled everything from the start till the end of employment. My maids only communicated with me but not to my husband. It is easier like that as I will be the only one that make all decisions. Men are usually weak when opposite gender is involved. Some maids are very clever. They will see who the weaker one and use that to their advantage.

Don't wait too long. I believe in tackling things early otherwise it will get even more difficult to fire her.



Agree. The nude photos on its own appears innocuous. It's not like she is showing them to the whole world but it's disturbing enough. Why on earth she needs to take those photos for? Get rid of her before she start to cause trouble like secretly meeting men outside or hitting on male members of the family.

HVR
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Re: Maid with Indecent Photos

Postby bebe » Wed Jun 26, 2013 9:09 am

My friend sent her maid immediate after she found those indecent pics on her phone - both female and male private parts. Not sure if the maid got the pics from her friends or she took them herself. But the fact that she is keeping these in her phone and my friend has a 10 yrs old son..she is not going to take the chance. My friend also took snap shots of these pics as evidences in case the maid cried foul against her. She did not show these pics to her hubby but she showed them to the agency instead.

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Re: Maid with Indecent Photos

Postby chixchix » Wed Jun 26, 2013 11:20 am

I am afraid that my hubby will turn around and tell me why do i need to see her phone or even tell me that its her body ,her phone, why i kaypoh...also i have my in laws over so a lot of cooking and cleaning now, if I send her off, then i will be in trouble. sigh..

What if she deletes them and says I am lying ?

chixchix
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Re: Maid with Indecent Photos

Postby glass » Wed Jun 26, 2013 11:28 am

chixchix, you may want to reevaluate your relationship with your husband. Why doesn't he want to listen to you?

If you feel you definitely need a maid and cannot do with one, then you can approach the agency to find a replacement before sending this one away. You might have to get a transfer maid who might have other issues, or wait for a new one.

Hope you can solve this quickly.

glass
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Re: Maid with Indecent Photos

Postby Dazzle » Wed Jun 26, 2013 1:51 pm

Though there is no evidence that she is up to no good, but I also find that those pic are rather disturbing. I have a maid before whom I sent back because I accidentally came across (I clicked History on desktop) her social network page where her male on-line friend posed in his underwear and her picture taken in my house which could only be taken by someone whom she let in without my knowledge. In my opinion, if you are not comfortable having her in the house, it is better to let her go. I heard of a story about a maid in Malaysia having sex with the employer's teenage son and passed VD to him. It is a scary thought. On the other hand, it is possible that your maid is just a narcissist and is not up to no good. You have to observe her and size her up. Btw, like ngl2010, I communicate with my maid and my husband steer clear of it. In this way, there is no unnecessary misunderstanding, no conflicting instructions and the maid know she should only approach you instead of your husband.

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Re: Maid with Indecent Photos

Postby lifestylelink » Wed Jun 26, 2013 1:55 pm

instead of worrying about anything the could have happen when we are out of the house, I choose to be maid-free, though extremely tiring...

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