Troubled by Tutor's action

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Troubled by Tutor's action

Postby heyhoe » Mon Feb 21, 2011 9:00 am

I'm trouble by the incident that happen last Saturday. I hope parents here can shed some lights as to what action should I take.

My ds1 attended chinese tuition with the same tutor for almost 2 years plus. Last Saturday, he cried after the tuition teacher left. He said that he doesn't want to continue with the chinese tuition. I sat and talked to him and he mentioned that the teacher actually bend his finger, step on his feet and pull his cheek. He said the teacher did that as he did not answer her questions fast enough.

Dh who sent the teacher out told me that ds1 drifted off and didn't give her the right answers despite her going thru with him a few times. She didn't mentioned that he did anything to him.

Now both of us are disturbed by what happened. We have yet to speak to the teacher but intend to do so when she come by this weekend. This teacher is also my ds2 and ds3 childcare teacher.

heyhoe
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Postby dramamama70 » Mon Feb 21, 2011 3:51 pm

I am quite alarmed by what you wrote. It's highly unlikely that kids are able to concoct such detailed story at a young age. Were/Are there any pinch marks that you could see? I would seriously encourage you to just change tutor.

Also, if your child is dreading the lessons, there obviously is a mismatch between how the tutor is teaching your child and how your child learns. And especially since there is alleged pinching/stepping etc, that alone is a red flag to me.

Hope things will get better for your ds soon.

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Postby heyhoe » Mon Feb 21, 2011 5:12 pm

Thanks dramamama70 for your comments.

I don't think my kid would lie too but I do know he could be over sensitive.

The teacher has been with us for the past 2 years and I know she puts in effort to teach. Neverthless, it still comes to the wellbeing of a child that is most important.

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Postby verykiasu2010 » Mon Feb 21, 2011 5:14 pm

heyhoe wrote:Thanks dramamama70 for your comments.

I don't think my kid would lie too but I do know he could be over sensitive.

The teacher has been with us for the past 2 years and I know she puts in effort to teach. Neverthless, it still comes to the wellbeing of a child that is most important.


of all of last two years - any problem ? why the 'sudden' change in behaviour by the tutor ?
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Postby heyhoe » Mon Feb 21, 2011 5:24 pm

Hi verykiasu2010,

My ds didn't mentioned before until last week, that occassionally she will step on his feet.

I find it puzzling too but now I wonder is it because she has more students now. We have been recommending her to our friends whom I know she charges more as their kids are on higher levels.

At times, I wonder if it is just frustration of teaching that overcomes her. Sigh, don't know if I should talk to her first or just let ds quit. Afterall, I still have two other ds under her at childcare.

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Postby 30plus » Mon Feb 21, 2011 6:00 pm

It's hard to guess what had happened. Stand from the tutor's point, I have better way for corporal punishment than 'step on feet'. Child may not lie but they may blend imagination with reality. My son of 5 can tell very sophisticated story mixed with imagination if he wants something to happen or not happen.

But there is one thing obvious, your son does not like the teacher and/or the tuition itself. So give him a break and see whether he is overloaded by tuition.

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Postby verykiasu2010 » Mon Feb 21, 2011 9:21 pm

heyhoe wrote:Hi verykiasu2010,

My ds didn't mentioned before until last week, that occassionally she will step on his feet.

I find it puzzling too but now I wonder is it because she has more students now. We have been recommending her to our friends whom I know she charges more as their kids are on higher levels.

At times, I wonder if it is just frustration of teaching that overcomes her. Sigh, don't know if I should talk to her first or just let ds quit. Afterall, I still have two other ds under her at childcare.


best to have a chat with the tutor, with an open mind
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Postby HappyFaye » Mon Feb 21, 2011 9:51 pm

Agree to have a good talk with the tutor and give your ds a break. I heard from my friends that her tutor who pulled her dd's hair when dd could not understand after repeated instructions. :x

i guess some tutors are just not patient enough and tutoring may not be their passion.

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Postby ascklee » Sat Mar 05, 2011 4:55 pm

"bend his finger, step on his feet and pull his cheek" -- definitely not acceptable!

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Postby Little M » Sat Mar 05, 2011 11:46 pm

I think you should do some investigation. Like ask the kids that were in the class at the time. Just to have a fair view of what happened.

If the teacher really did do those things. Then I would change the tutor immediately. Under no circumstances that the tutor is allowed to do this to a child.

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