All About Autism

Discuss issues related to children who have special needs or learning difficulties
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DesertWind
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All About Autism

Post by DesertWind » Sat Feb 14, 2015 7:24 pm

Talking about caning. Seriously, there is a cut-off time for it. By 8 or 9 years old cannot liao! In fact, I will cut off at 7 yo, or once the kid start primary school. From my own experience won't work already! My mum got to put away her cane when we reached 8 or 9 and we were quite relieved that she no longer treated us like "babies"!
For my boy, now that he is 7 yo, in fact he will start to look hurt and tears if I pull out the cane...even just to warn and not to hit! So buay-sai liao.

But for my younger one, 3 1/2 yo, the CANE is it! How many times he threw down ko-ko's books in anger or wanted attention is how many times I will hit him with the cane! He cannot win or get away for being naughty! Until now, with a glare, or a raised index-finger, he froze. That is the effect that I want. Otherwise, how to control him outside or when he is older, to let him know you mean business?

Couragemom
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Re: All About Autism

Post by Couragemom » Sat Feb 14, 2015 7:33 pm

Hi Dessertwind,

That is my greatest worry! The noise!!!! I suspect my son has some auditory processing issue so I kept him in a premium CC where the child teacher ratio is kept low. It is soooo expensive but I treat it as part of his intervention! My NT daughter goes to a church kindergarten and the student teacher ratio is 24:2 but but school fees is 4x cheaper!!!

phtthp
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Re: All About Autism

Post by phtthp » Sun Feb 15, 2015 9:37 am

DesertWind wrote:One thing the shadow teacher shared which struck me is the class is very, very noisy. She also got a headache and she pitied the teachers. When the teacher shout to get the kids to quieten down, apparently my boy got a shock and will cover his ears and whine. Seems like a war-zone each day....jia lat! :faint:
One P1 / P2 class of 30 kids in All boys school, is very noisy.
Same too, for 30 kids in all girls school, or co-Ed school.
Tr always ask kids to keep quiet
have to get used to it, slowly

scang
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Re: All About Autism

Post by scang » Mon Feb 16, 2015 1:05 am

It was an interesting seminar/talk on the Son-Rise program.

Image

The 4 basic fundamentals was shared by Raun K. Kaufman, who fully recovered from Autism: 1) Joining 2) Motivation 3) Socialization 4) Attitude.

The method was basically to create the relationship with the child, instead of simply changing the child's behaviour, and in the process brings them out of "their world" into "our world" or society norms. This is done through the child's own motivation and change, and with the right attitude from parents to bring about that change.

A different and refreshing approach to tackle Autism and special needs.

tyeogh
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Re: All About Autism

Post by tyeogh » Mon Feb 16, 2015 12:18 pm

DesertWind wrote:Talking about caning. Seriously, there is a cut-off time for it. By 8 or 9 years old cannot liao! In fact, I will cut off at 7 yo, or once the kid start primary school. From my own experience won't work already! My mum got to put away her cane when we reached 8 or 9 and we were quite relieved that she no longer treated us like "babies"!
For my boy, now that he is 7 yo, in fact he will start to look hurt and tears if I pull out the cane...even just to warn and not to hit! So buay-sai liao.

But for my younger one, 3 1/2 yo, the CANE is it! How many times he threw down ko-ko's books in anger or wanted attention is how many times I will hit him with the cane! He cannot win or get away for being naughty! Until now, with a glare, or a raised index-finger, he froze. That is the effect that I want. Otherwise, how to control him outside or when he is older, to let him know you mean business?
I think the cut off depends on each child. To me, the question is when does a child stops being a child and in my mind that age is 12. I rarely cane my eldest girl who is 11 this year. Maybe like once in a year. I find that reasoning works better at this age.

Same for my 10 y.o, girl. Nonetheless, they are both aware daddy will not hesitate to discipline them any time. It gives them a sense of assuredness that someone is guiding them.

They actually feel closer to me. We do our ipod My songs are better than your songs debate every now and then, and dance to our music (do your hubbies do such crazy things? Wife thinks I am childish. Blast our rooms with Taylor Swift and Shake it off, Shake it off!) This is the age I give more positive reinforcements. They are told how good they are more often than how wrong they are. Like 90% to 10%.

The other 2 boys at 8 and 5 still get whacked frequently. One is very good at acting and cry before the cane appears. Children not stupid. I not stupid either.


CatMoon
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Re: All About Autism

Post by CatMoon » Tue Feb 24, 2015 3:15 pm

Hi parents, need your advice!

My cousin's boy is now 14 years old and was diagnosed with Asperger's. He did his PSLE (I think he took Foundation subjects) at Pathlight in 2013 and was very happy there. However, the school arranged for him to attend secondary school at Pierce (satellite partner) and he was told he had to attend full-day lessons (previously he had only 2 hour lessons daily).

My cousin pulled him out of school as there would only be 1 aided teacher who will be managing a small group of them. They were worried that:
- he cannot take more than 2 hours lessons
- there is no one to manage him if he has a meltdown (no minders)
- he has to mingle with other kids during recess
- they are afraid that he would be bullied (as in previous cases) as other kids would not understand why he is anti-social & can react negatively to their touch (he is sensitive to this).

I'm worried as he is now NOT attending school - just staying at home all day. Where can he go? Should he take private courses?

Thanks so much for your kind advice!

ImMeeMee
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Re: All About Autism

Post by ImMeeMee » Wed Feb 25, 2015 7:46 am

CatMoon wrote:Hi parents, need your advice!

My cousin's boy is now 14 years old and was diagnosed with Asperger's. He did his PSLE (I think he took Foundation subjects) at Pathlight in 2013 and was very happy there. However, the school arranged for him to attend secondary school at Pierce (satellite partner) and he was told he had to attend full-day lessons (previously he had only 2 hour lessons daily).

My cousin pulled him out of school as there would only be 1 aided teacher who will be managing a small group of them. They were worried that:
- he cannot take more than 2 hours lessons
- there is no one to manage him if he has a meltdown (no minders)
- he has to mingle with other kids during recess
- they are afraid that he would be bullied (as in previous cases) as other kids would not understand why he is anti-social & can react negatively to their touch (he is sensitive to this).

I'm worried as he is now NOT attending school - just staying at home all day. Where can he go? Should he take private courses?

Thanks so much for your kind advice!
CatMoon

My daughter is in PL primary section, so I do not have any experience on the secondary school section. Personally, I feel that PL's satellite model is a pretty good approach to help the kids blend into the mainstream environment, so wondering whether there is any chance of putting him into the environment and dealing with the issues, rather than pull him out altogether? If we dont try, we may never know.

JMHO

CatMoon
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Re: All About Autism

Post by CatMoon » Wed Feb 25, 2015 8:09 am

ImMeeMee wrote:
CatMoon

My daughter is in PL primary section, so I do not have any experience on the secondary school section. Personally, I feel that PL's satellite model is a pretty good approach to help the kids blend into the mainstream environment, so wondering whether there is any chance of putting him into the environment and dealing with the issues, rather than pull him out altogether? If we dont try, we may never know.

JMHO
Thanks JMHO! Some parents have pm me with the same advice and I seriously do agree with you. I'm going to advise my cousin again to send her boy back (even though she and her husband are feeling so lost & discourage). I think it would be good for my nephew in the long term.

Thanks once again to all the kind & sharing parents!

slmkhoo
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Re: All About Autism

Post by slmkhoo » Wed Feb 25, 2015 8:49 am

CatMoon wrote:
ImMeeMee wrote:
CatMoon

My daughter is in PL primary section, so I do not have any experience on the secondary school section. Personally, I feel that PL's satellite model is a pretty good approach to help the kids blend into the mainstream environment, so wondering whether there is any chance of putting him into the environment and dealing with the issues, rather than pull him out altogether? If we dont try, we may never know.

JMHO
Thanks JMHO! Some parents have pm me with the same advice and I seriously do agree with you. I'm going to advise my cousin again to send her boy back (even though she and her husband are feeling so lost & discourage). I think it would be good for my nephew in the long term.

Thanks once again to all the kind & sharing parents!
You may want to share this story with your cousin - my husband has an uncle, now in his late 50s, who seems to have Asperger's. I say "seems" because there was no such diagnosis or support available in his schooldays, so we are just drawing our own conclusions. According to my husband's older siblings, this uncle was always not very social, didn't manage well in school and often got bullied, and so his mother let him drop out of school around Sec 2. He tried several unskilled jobs but always had problems with his employers, and his mother eventually let him stay at home while she went out to work. Over the years, he got more and more withdrawn and helpless, and now just watches TV all day and doesn't talk to anyone other than his mother. With the better understanding and support which is available now but was unknown 50 yrs ago, I think the outcome could have been very different. Every time I see this uncle, I resolve that I will do my best not to let that happen to my daughter. Even though I know that coping with school, classmates and studies can be tough for her (and for us parents!), and transitioning to work will probably be even tougher, I will not let her just stay at home.

susan_tan76
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Re: All About Autism

Post by susan_tan76 » Wed Feb 25, 2015 9:05 am

Hi parents!

I just went to KK Hospital a few days ago to do a check up for my child who is currently 3 years old. He is suspected of developmental delay and autism. I would like to know if there are any good early intervention programmes out there for recommendation. Please help! Thank you all!

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