stranger anxiety

Talk about issues regarding looking after babies in the 1st 3 years of their lives.

stranger anxiety

Postby chibi » Wed Jan 25, 2012 11:57 pm

hiya all
my 13month ds2 had stranger anxiety when he was around 8 months , and if strangers talk to him, he will start to cry.it gets better now though, with us bringing him for walks almost every day.
but he refused to let pple other than family members or close relatives carry him, not even when my mum's friend who played with him happily when we bump into her while shopping , but the moment she wanted to carry him, he will start crying :sweat:
it is " u can touch me, play with me, or even kiss me, but no carrying :siam: "
i know it is good in a way pple can't carry him and run off as he will scream his head off. :duck:

I know it is a phrase they will go through.how can i help him overcome it?
thnks! :love:

chibi
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Re: stranger anxiety

Postby DedicatedDad » Thu Jan 26, 2012 6:52 am

It's take time. Visit ur friends and relatives house often. Visit playground often.
My son had this problem. When people come to our house he will cry. Playground no problem cos kids. Go to other people house also he cry. Then we visit a family more often. Then he slowly familiar with them. Then we vist other families. Most importantly I hold him if not he will cry. Then 2+ he went to playgroup, no crying.I have no problem in his social moving in primary school. Now he is in p4.in kindergarten he is very quite.that time I worried. Luckily p1 no problem like do show and tell infront of the class or talking with T when needed.

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Re: stranger anxiety

Postby chibi » Thu Jan 26, 2012 9:43 am

thanks DedicatedDad for your reply :smile:
i thought of sending my son to playgrp when he reaches 20 months , but think i need to ease his stranger anxiety first.
he can play with kids and adults,giggling and even hugging them but it is seriously a " you better don't attempt to carry me. if not i will scream my head off!" situation.
my mum was saying, at least now when strangers talk to him he don't cry, letting pple he don't know carry him will take time. i read that stranger anxiety might peak from 12- 18 months.
my dd1 had this too when she was a toddler, but it gets better when she grows up .

chibi
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Re: stranger anxiety

Postby coast » Thu Jan 26, 2012 11:47 am

chibi wrote:thanks DedicatedDad for your reply :smile:
i thought of sending my son to playgrp when he reaches 20 months , but think i need to ease his stranger anxiety first.
he can play with kids and adults,giggling and even hugging them but it is seriously a " you better don't attempt to carry me. if not i will scream my head off!" situation.
my mum was saying, at least now when strangers talk to him he don't cry, letting pple he don't know carry him will take time. i read that stranger anxiety might peak from 12- 18 months.
my dd1 had this too when she was a toddler, but it gets better when she grows up .


My DS was cheerful when he was a baby/toddler but like yours, he would not allow strangers to carry him. He is a fine young boy now who is well-liked by adults and teachers.

Do not over focus on his stranger anxiety as your concern might rub on him. Just continue showering him with love and maintain a close bonding with him. Continue to let him play with other kids and adults. Be there when he needs you :)

coast
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Re: stranger anxiety

Postby KimMills » Thu Jul 04, 2013 2:43 pm

In a way it is very useful as well, as you said, no one can carry him and run away. Anyways, if you want to let his anxiety go away you should take him to meet more and more people and friends, in playgrounds, malls, friends' place, etc where he would get accustomed with people.

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Re: stranger anxiety

Postby alllove » Thu Jan 16, 2014 4:27 pm

I think you can continue to bring him for walk and play at the playground. To me, it is normal for children to demonstrate this. My child at the beginning do not have this problem and now start to show anxiety meeting stranger. I do not think this is a problem. It should become better as they grow and after they attend child care.

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